Thursday, April 30, 2009

5/1-PCW Newsline: Cheney Looks to Waterboard Specter, American Patriots “Leaderless, Rudderless, and Clueless?”


Hey y'all. Gina Ramsey here with this week's Political Championship Wrestling Newsline.

It's been another eventful week in PCW. Lot's of exciting things are going on so let's get right to it.






4/29-PCW Extreme Political TV Recap

-Nancy Pelosi comes out and gloats over Al Franken's huge win Sunday night over Norm Coleman and Arlen Specter jumping from the American Patriots to the Progressive Alliance.

-Dick Cheney and W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad come out looking for Specter so they can waterboard him just like they waterboarded PCW Women's Champion Tessa Martin Sunday night. Pelosi wants him locked up but then a tape plays that shows she was aware of the tactics Cheney intended to use.

- Average Joe and the American Trucker w/Tequila Sheila (American Heartland Coalition) def. newcomers Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers) when SNAFU interfered and allowed American Trucker to Schoolboy Mr. Jaundice for the pin.

-Cheney, Rove, Perino, Card, and Fleischer prowl the hallways looking for Specter.

-'The 7 Foot Tall Weapon of Mass Destruction' Big Monster Wahlie w/Rough Justice: D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice (Domination Inc.) destroyed Snott Flemmstein w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers) in thirty-one seconds. Afterwards, 'Sports Entertainment Genius' Mr. McMann said: "Come on PCW. Is this the best you've got? Where's O'Beck Bahama hiding this week? Where's the great PCW Champion at? Domination Inc. is back on track. Now that I've disposed of the mole and all the dead weight slowing us down, Domination Inc. is poised to become THE force in Political Championship Wrestling."

-MAIN EVENT- #1 CONTENDER'S MATCH FOR THE PCW WOMEN'S TITLE
Kathryn Randall Collins aka KRC w/Hillary Clinton and the Clinton Political Pitbulls-James Carville and Paul Begala (Progressive Alliance)vs. Hallie Burton w/'The Mastermind' Karl Rove (Extreme Neo-Con Alliance)vs. Mercedes w/Porsche Lexus and Rough Justice- D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice (Domination Inc.) goes to no match when 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin took out Hallie Burton and a very angry Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen destroyed both KRC and Mercedes after being left out of the match.

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PCW RANKINGS:

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘The New Rookie Sensation’ O’Beck Bahama (Progressive Alliance)

CONTENDERS:
#1- A. Tom Bomb (American Patriots)
#2- Big Monster Wahlie (Domination Inc.)
#3- Cadillac (Domination Inc.)

PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition)
CONTENDERS:

#1- Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen (SarahPac)
#3- Mercedes (Domination Inc.)

PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (Domination, Inc.)
CONTENDERS:

#1- Schett Brothers- Jack Schett and Bull Schett (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Incendiary Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (American Patriots)
#3- Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade (American Heartland Coalition)

PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance)
CONTENDERS:

#1- Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)
#2- SNAFU (Independent)
#3- Dave the Mechanic (American Heartland Coalition)

-----------------------

NEWS AND VIEWS- PCW INVESTIGATIVE REPORTER WOODWARD BERNSTEIN

PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin
-The hot rumor floating around is that Tessa could be leaving Political Championship Wrestling in the next few weeks for her own show. This would deal a devastating blow to the fledgling American Heartland Coalition of which Tessa has taken on a leadership role. Stay tuned on this one for further developments.

American Patriots- Bomb Brothers Drama
-A. Tom Bomb, Hy Drogen Bomb, and Newt Tron Bomb are very upset with the lack of leadership in the American Patriots group. John McCain persuaded the Bombs to come back to the American Patriots earlier in the year but the situation has deteriorated to the point where A-Bomb blurted out in a meeting that the AP was "leaderless, rudderless, and clueless." It has reached the point that the Bombs are considering leaving Political Championship Wrestling.

The Bombs have been a staple of PCW since its creation in 2005. It's hard to imagine PCW without the Bombs in it. Let's hope it doesn't get to that point.

Progressive Alliance- Schett Brothers Drama
-Speaking of high drama, it look as if the Progressive Alliance and Jack and Bull Schett have fallen out of love with each other. Jack Schett was very vocal at a PA meeting about the lack of push they feel they're getting to recapturing the PCW Tag Team titles. Jack also brought up the PA's focus on the PCW Title at the expense of the tag team belts. If the Schetts leave, it would cripple the Progressive Alliance's chances of regaining the tag team belts anytime soon. It's be interesting to see how this plays out in the next few weeks.

American Patriots- Dick Cheney
-Many American Patriots members are privately fuming over Dick Cheney and the W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad's action over the past two weeks. Many were appalled at the sight of PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin being waterboarded Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN. There is a clear division within the AP about Cheney's actions and it continues to fracture the group into separate groups.

-----------------------------

DOMINATION INC. PRESS RELEASE

Domination Inc would like to congratulate our 'seven foot Weapon of Mass Destruction' Big Monster Wahlie on his successful debut in Political Championship Wrestling. It is painfully clear after two matches that BMW is simply heads above everyone else in PCW- even PCW Champion O'Beck Bahama. The only reason Bahama continues to be the PCW Champion is because he's been protected by the PCW CEO Barack Obama and Bahama's manager Justin Sufferable.

BMW has thrown out an open challenge to O'Beck Bahama to meet him at any time- either on PCW on P-SPAN or PCW Extreme Political TV. Until the Big Monster gets a response, he'll continue to tear through the clearly inferior PCW competition. In fact, the competition is so pathetic BMW will take on not just one wrestler but TWO Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN. Somehow, our guess is that BMW will still be able to easily dispatch his two opponents.

Domination Inc. would also like to note the upcoming six month anniversary of Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit's Tag Team Title reign. It seems just yesterday that the Domination Inc stars easily took the Tag Team belts from the Schett Brothers at PCW Extreme Election Night 2008. Congratulations Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit and we hope that you continue to be 'team' players.

About Domination Inc:
Domination Inc. is a wrestling consortium that competes in Political Championship Wrestling. Our stated goal is to be THE single dominating force in PCW by any and all means necessary.

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UPCOMING EVENTS @ www.politicalwrestling.wordpress.com :
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/17- PCW on P-SPAN
5/20- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/22- PCW Newsline

NEXT MONTH:
6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV

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PREVIEW: 5/3-PCW ON P-SPAN:
-SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) vs. Captain Nausea (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
-Hallie Burton w/'The Mastermind' Karl Rove (Extreme Neo-Con Alliance) vs. Kathryn Randall Collins w/Hillary Clinton and the Clinton Political Pitbulls- James Carville and Paul Begala (Progressive Alliance)
-
Mercedes w/Porsche Lexus and Rough Justice (Domination Inc.) vs. Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen w/The Alaskan Pitbull Sarah Palin (SarahPAC)
-
Handicap Match: Michael Hunt and Richard Headd of 'Guys With Unfortunate First Names Given Their Last Names' w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers) vs. the 7 foot Weapons of Mass Destruction Big Monster Wahlie w/Cadillac, Jaguar, and Rough Justice (Domination Inc.)
-Plus, more fall out over the Nancy Pelosi tape showing her allowing Dick Cheney to use waterboarding in PCW and a whole lot more...

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

4/29-PCW Extreme Political TV


4/29-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV from the Palace of Political Extreme- PCW Hall in Archbold, Ohio
HOSTS: Johnny Suave and his life size cardboard cut-out of Shania Twain

Crowd: "PCW...PCW...PCW!" Suave: "HELLO AND WELCOME TO PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV! I'M JOHNNY SUAVE. THIS HOT PIECE OF CARDBOARD IS SHANIA TWAIN! THE WRESTLING WORD IS STILL BUZZING OVER WHAT TOOK PLACE SUNDAY NIGHT ON PCW ON P-SPAN. IF YOU MISSED IT, HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED..."

REPLAY FROM 4/26 PCW ON P-SPAN: The aftermath of the Steel Cage Grudge Match:Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs.PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin
Suave: "TESSA MARTIN GETS THE WIN AND...NOW WHAT? DICK CHENEY WANTS TO SHAKE TESSA'S HAND NOW? IS HE NUTS?" Dick thrusts his hand out to Tessa. Tessa looks around the crowd and gauges their response. Dick: "Shake my f***ing hand!" Tessa's eyes widen. Then she Pizza Cutters Dick. The crowd explodes. Suave: "PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! TESSA JUST PIZZA CUTTER'D DICK...NOW SHE'S BEING ATTACKED BY W'S IMAGE REHAB AND TRUTH SQUAD!" Card, Perino, Fleisher, and Rove beat down Tessa. 'The Queen of Political Extreme' Ann Coulter and former PCW Women's Champion Hallie Burton enter the cage. Coulter grabs Garofalo and handcuffs her to the side of the cage. Suave: "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? THE QUEEN OF POLITICAL EXTREME ANN COULTER HAS HANDCUFFED JANEANE GAROFALO TO THE CAGE. AND NOW, ARI FLEISCHER AND ANDREW CARD HAVE BROUGHT IN A BARREL FULL OF WATER? AND A BOARD? Oh...no." Burton pulls Tessa up and drapes her on the board. Perino handcuffs Tessa's arms behind her back around the board and Fleischer and Card lower her into the water. Suave: "NO! STOP THEM! THAT'S NOT RIGHT!" Lamb: "My God. Are they actually...waterboarding her?" Suave: "WHAT THE HELL DOES IT LOOK LIKE, BRIAN?" Suave jumps on top of the announcer's table. Suave: "DICK, THIS IS WRONG! STOP IT!" Dick sneers at Suave and has a microphone.
*
Dick: "Of course you would think that way, Suave. Because you're weak. You all are weak! When you face an enemy, do you worry about piddly little minute details such as the Geneva Convention?" Coulter takes a steel chair and blasts Garofalo with it. Suave: "HOLY CRAP! SHE'S KNOCKED OUT!" Dick: "F*** no! You do what you have to do to win. To project strength and to deter those who would harm you." Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Steny Hoyer run to the ring. Dick flips them off. Suave: "THIS IS JUST WRONG!" The board is pulled out of the barrel of water and laid on the canvas. Cheney, Card, Rove, Perino, etal then exit the cage. Dick again flips off Pelosi etal as they smugly walk to the back. Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean Up Crew quickly enter the ring and attend to Garofalo and Tessa.
*
Suave: "So the question is-" Female voice: "HOLD ON! HOLD ON JUST A MINUTE!" Nancy Pelosi walks out and heads towards the ring with a grinning Al Franken. Suave: "THERE'S AL FRANKEN WHO WON THAT BRUTAL HARDCORE BARBED WIRE DEATHMATCH OVER NORM COLEMAN SUNDAY NIGHT." Franken is bandaged up from the match. Pelosi and Franken enter the ring. Pelosi: Hold on just a moment! Now, before I get to Dick Cheney and waterboarding, can we all give it up for Al Franken?" Polite applause. Pelosi: "Didn't he do a great job in defeating once and for all- Norm Coleman?" More polite applause. Pelosi: "I think so. With Al Franken winning Sunday night and the news today that longtime stalwart of the American Patriots, Arlen Specter finally got tired of Rush Limbaugh running the show and joined the Progressive Alliance, it's been a great week for the Progressive Alliance."
*
Dick Cheney and the rest of W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad- "The Mastermind" Karl Rove, Dana Perino, Ari Fleischer, and Andrew Card, appear and they head to the ring. Twenty-five percent of the audience cheers. The rest boo. They climb into the ring. Rove keeps pointing to his temple to make sure everyone knows he's a friggin' genius. Cheney: "Oh boo-f***-ing hoo. Where is he?" Pelosi: "Where is who?" Cheney: "Where is that two-timing ***** ******* traitor Arlen Specter? If you see him, tell him I've got a ticket for him." Pelosi: "A ticket?" Cheney: "That's right. A ticket. A one way ticket to what I like to call- Club Gitmo." The lights shine on the side of PCW Hall and illuminate a pool of water and a board on the side to lower someone in. More boos roll in. Cheney: "Just like Janeane Garofalo found out last week. Just like 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin found out last week. Just like Arlen Specter is going to find out THIS week." Cheney pauses for more boos. Cheney: "If you're not with us, you're against us. Arlen Specter...where ever you're hiding...if you can't stand the heat...we'll, don't worry...I'VE got something that'll cool you right off." Cheney points to the waterboarding device inside 'Club Gitmo.'
*
Pelosi: "I think that's terrible! They should lock you up, Dick Cheney, for waterboarding Tessa Martin last week." Cheney: "Nancy, with all due respect, you've known that we were going to use waterboarding for quite a long time." Pelosi: W-what? That's simply not true. I've never been a part of any briefing where the subject of waterboarding-"
*
TAPE FROM MEETING OF THE PCW COMPETITION COMMITTEE A FEW WEEKS AGO
Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Steny Hoyer representing the Progressive Alliance, and Mitch McConnell and John Boehner of the American Patriots sit at a table with Cheney, Rove, and Don Rumsfeld. Pelosi: "So...the consensus is that because PCW has already allowed chloroform, jumper cables, tasers, cattle prods, that we're going to allow powerful drugs that are transmitted by touch that cause temporary paralysis?" Everyone murmurs yes. Pelosi: "Okay. Motion carried." Cheney: "Nancy, any objection to the use of waterboarding in PCW events?" Pelosi: "That's fine. Whatever. Next?
*
Pelosi's jaw drops. Cheney: "Now, madame speaker. If you don't mind, we need to engage in a man hunt for Mr. Specter."
*
---------------
*
Suave: "Well. That can't be good. Last week on PCW Extreme Political TV, we had the successful debut of Movie Classic, who'll be taking over the reins of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers group.
*
REPLAY: LAST WEEK'S PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV:
ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS LOCKER ROOM
...A guy wearing sunglasses and a tacky sports coat walks in. MAN: "Look at this dressing room. I see dead people. Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." Jimmy: "Who are you?" MAN: "I'm Movie Classic. Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make?" Snott: "What. Listen to children do what? What are you talking about?" DVD: "Really. Just leave us alone to our fate." Dredd Pirate Dougie: "War's over, man. Dr. Bill dropped the big one on us." Movie Classic: "Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!" Richard Headd: "Germans?" Dr. Rectum: "Shhhh, he's rolling." Movie Classic: "And it ain't over now. 'Cause when the goin' gets tough..." A long pause follows. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers wait...and wait...and wait for him to finish the sentence. Movie Classic: "...the the tough get goin'! Who's with me? Let's go!"
*
THE END OF NEWT TRON BOMB (American Patriots) vs. SNAFU MATCH LAST WEEK:
Suave: "SNAFU sets the chair up for the Triple Jump Moonsault. WAIT A MINUTE! HOLY CRAP! JIMMY FROM SO CAL JUST PUSHED SNAFU OFF TH ROPES!" Movie Classic comes up to Dr. Bill. Movie Classic: "Say hello to my little friends!" Richard Headd, Snott Flemmstein, and Dredd Pirate Douggie tackle Dr. Bill.
*
Suave: "IT'S THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS! THEY'RE PUMMELING DR. BILL!" SNAFU is up and staggers towards the ring. Suave: "S.M. ART BOMB THROWS SNAFU BACK IN THE RING. N-BOMB STICK HIS BUTT IN HIS FACE. OOOOOHHHH! ICK! SILENT BUT DEADLY! SILENT BUT DEADLY! N-BOMB COVERS. ONE. TWO. THREE!"

WINNER: NEWT TRON BOMB

Suave: "Movie Classic leads the Island of Misfit Wrestlers to get their revenge on Dr. Bill for leading them to be slaughtered by Domination Inc. last Sunday. AND THEY'RE NOT DONE YET! THEY'VE SET UP A TABLE AND DRAPED DR. BILL ON IT. DVD TO THE TOP ROPE. HE JUMPS. HE MISSES! OW! ALL RIGHT, HERE'S DREDD PIRATE DOUGGIE. *CRUNCH* HOLY CRAP!" Dr. Bill is driven through the table. Another PCW chant starts up.
*
MATCH #1
MR. JAUNDICE and CAPTAIN NAUSEA w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
vs. AVERAGE JOE and THE AMERICAN TRUCKER w/Tequila Sheila (American Heartland Coalition)
Suave: "This is the debut for Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea and they are...um...let's say...color appropriate. Yellow and green is an interesting mix of colors." The bell rings. Suave: "Jaundice starts with Average Joe. Joe grabs a wristlock. Jaundice reverses it into an armbar. Joe counters into an armwringer. Jaundice with a takedown. Off the ropes, Jaundice runs into a monkeyflip. Captain Nausea in and hits a drop toehold on Joe. Jaundice with a senton off the ropes on Average Joe." American Trucker runs in and dropkicks Captain Nausea and sends him outside.
*
Suave: "Jaundice whips Average Joe into the corner and tags in Captain Nausea. Neckbreaker by Nausea for two. He locks in a chinlock, but Average Joe elbows out. Nausea goes for a back suplex. American Trucker in the ring...he clips the legs. Average Joe falls on top of him for a cover. One...two...no. Jaundice makes the save! American Trucker charges into a back elbow. Jaundice off the top rope...and he runs right into a dropkick! Average Joe covers. One...two-shoulder up. Backdrop by Average Joe. He's got Jaundice up...SPINEBUSTER! Average Joe covers. One, two, no! Jaundice kicks out. Average Joe gets backdropped to the apron. Captain Nausea elbows him to the floor. Double-team on American Trucker....DOUBLE TEAM SUPLEX! Cover...HERE COMES SNAFU!"
*
SNAFU slides in the ring with a steel folding chair. *CLANG* Suave: "HE JUST NAILED CAPTAIN NAUSEA! MOVIE CLASSIC IN THE RING. *CLANG* HOLY CRAP! SCHOOLBOY ROLL-UP ON JAUNDICE BY AMERICAN TRUCKER! ONE...TWO...THREE!"
*
WINNER: AMERICAN TRUCKER and AVERAGE JOE
*
Dr. Bill comes out and smirks. He nods approvingly and he and SNAFU walk to the back.
*
----------------------
*
COMMERCIAL TIME:
The E-Wrestling Magazine is the home for all the latest news on e-federations all across the country. Check out PCW and all the latest stories:
*
Chairman Martin Plans to Redirect Company Wednesday, 29 April 2009 (/)
Just Wrestling's What Next? Tour: It Goes There Tuesday, 28 April 2009 (/)
Interview with Ron Meischker this Thursday Tuesday, 28 April 2009 (/)
4/26- PCW on P-SPAN: Coleman vs. Franken in Barbed Wire Deathmatch, Plus Women's Cage Match Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Dream Wrestling Plans DVD Release of 18 DWF Pay Per Views Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
2 new free poser shots Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
2 Posers by Eric for EWZine Release Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Eight Random Roleplays 04.26.09 Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
SWF LIVE (Full Report) Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com Exclusive Web Show Airs! Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
4/25-PCW Extra: The Coleman/Franken Feud Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
All-Star Championship Wrestling 4/16/09 Report Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com to Air Two Matches Sunday! Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
The Big Shot 04.23.09 Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
BOB: Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #20 Results! Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
-------------------------
Fed Wars.org - Fed Wars is an interfed promotion currently run by Ben Halkum. There are a number of e-feds already involved in this project.
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*
Suave: "Okay, we're back on PCW Extreme Political TV. It looks like Dick Cheney and the W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad are hot on the trail of Arlen Specter..."
*
BACKSTAGE
Cheney, Rove, Perino, Card, and Fleischer prowl the hallways looking for Specter.
*
Suave: "We'll catch up with them a little later. One guy who's easy to find is headed to the ring right now. The seven foot Weapon of Mass Destruction- Big Monster Wahlie!"
*
MATCH #2
'The 7 Foot Tall Weapon of Mass Destruction' BIG MONSTER WAHLIE w/Rough Justice: D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice (Domination Inc.)
vs. SNOTT FLEMMSTEIN w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Suave:
"It may just be me, but I just don't see an upset taking place here." Movie Classic takes a good look at Big Monster Wahlie. Movie Classic: "Man, I'd hate to take a bite outta you. You're a cookie full of arsenic!" Big Monster growls and Movie Classic wisely evacuates the ring. Suave: "And there's the bell. Flemmstein's going for the stream of snot offense from his nose. Yeah...doesn't work. Oooh. Big body slam by Big Monster. OW! He stomps away at Flemmstein who tries to reach the ropes...but Big Monster drags him right back to the middle. He pulls Flemmstein to his feet, spins him around and lifts him up...ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER! HOLY CRAP! ONE...TWO...THREE."
*
WINNER: 'The 7 Foot Weapon of Mass Destruction' BIG MONSTER WAHLIE
*
Suave: "Once again, that was quick. OH. HERE WE GO AGAIN...BIG MONSTER HAS FLEMMSTEIN UP AGAIN... OHHHHHHH ANOTHER ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER! The referee tries to wave Big Monster off. Suave: "ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER TO THE REFEREE! HOLY CRAP! ANOTHER ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER TO FLEMMSTEIN!" 'Sports Entertainment Genius' Mr. McMann enters the ring. McMann: "Come on PCW. Is this the best you've got? Where's O'Beck Bahama hiding this week? Where's the great PCW Champion at? Domination Inc. is back on track. Now that I've disposed of the mole and all the dead weight slowing us down, Domination Inc. is poised to become THE force in Political Championship Wrestling." Suave: "Mr. McMann feeling pretty good after Big Monster Wahlie disposes of Snott Flemmstein."
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BACKSTAGE
Cheney, Rove, Card, Perino, and Fleischer continue to scour the dressing rooms looking for Arlen Specter.
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UPCOMING SHOWS:
PCW would like to highlight shows from other great e-federations who are out there. Check them out:
-------------------------
UPCOMING EVENTS:
*
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/17- PCW on P-SPAN
5/20- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/22- PCW Newsline
*
NEXT MONTH:
6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV
--------------------------------
*
MAIN EVENT- #1 CONTENDER'S MATCH FOR THE PCW WOMEN'S TITLE
KATHRYN RANDALL COLLINS aka KRC w/Hillary Clinton and the Clinton Political Pitbulls-James Carville and Paul Begala (Progressive Alliance)
vs. HALLIE BURTON w/'The Mastermind' Karl Rove (Extreme Neo-Con Alliance)
vs. MERCEDES w/Porsche Lexus and Rough Justice- D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice (Domination Inc.)
Suave: "Well, our main event is a three-way dance to become the new #1 contender for the PCW Women's title." The bell rings. Suave: "There's the bell and...WAIT A MINUTE! THAT'S PCW WOMEN'S CHAMPIONS 'EXTREME PIZZA DELIVERY GIRL' TESSA MARTIN! *WHAP* HOLY CRAP! SHE JUST TOOK OUT HALLIE BURTON WITH HER OVERSIZED PIZZA BOX! *WHAP* DOWN GOES KARL ROVE! TESSA THROWS BURTON INTO THE RING...PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! THE WOMEN'S CHAMPION SLIDES OUT OF THE RING AND IT'S GOING TO BE...KRC. SHE COVERS. ONE...TWO...THREE!"
*
HALLIE BURTON ELIMINATED
*
Suave: "WAIT! THE 'EXTREME PIZZA DELIVERY GIRL' ISN'T DONE YET. SHE'S BACK IN THE RING AND PULLS BURTON TO THE OUTSIDE APRON. SHE MOTIONS THE RING GUY TO GET OUT OF THE WAY. OH...NO...SHE'S NOT GOING TO...YES SHE IS..." Tessa Pizza Cutters Hallie Burton right through the table. Suave: "HOLY CRAP!" Tessa turns towards Rove who wisely vacates the ring area. Suave: "Tessa Martin is furious and she's not going to stop until she gets her hands on Dick Cheney. HOLD ON! THAT'S KALEE JONES-THE ESKIMO QUEEN AND THE ALASKAN PITBULL SARAH PALIN! WHAT ARE THEY DOING OUT HERE?" Kalee hits the ring and Eskimo Piefaces KRC. Suave: "HOLY CRAP! The Eskimo Queen caught KRC totally by surprise. AGAIN! THIS TIME IT'S MERCEDES! PORSCHE LEXUS RUNS IN...ESKIMO PIEFACE! ROUGH JUSTICE! *THWACK* PALIN JUST DECAPITATED D.B. RUFF WITH HOCKEY STICK! HOLY FREAKIN' CRAP! CARVILLE AND BEGALA IN THE RING. OWWWWWWW! PALIN JUST CRACKED HER HOCKEY STICK ON CARVILLE'S HEAD. IT'S TOTALLY OUT OF CONTROL NOW! DICK CHENEY HUNTING DOWN ARLEN SPECTER! KALEE JONES PISSED BECAUSE SHE WASN'T INCLUDED IN THE #1 CONTENDER'S MATCH. LOTS OF ISSUES OUTSTANDING. WE'LL SEE YOU SUNDAY NIGHT ON PCW ON P-SPAN!"

Sunday, April 26, 2009

4/26- PCW on P-SPAN: Garofalo vs. 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl', Coleman vs. Franken in Barbed Wire Deathmatch


Green World Order ('Extreme Vegan' Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete) vs. Grizzly Adam and NRA (SarahPAC)/Non-title Grudge Match inside a steel cage: Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs. PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition)/Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots) vs. PCW TV Champion 'No Frills' Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance) for PCW TV title/Norm Coleman (American Patriots) vs. Al Franken (Progressive Alliance) in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch.

4/26 PCW on P-SPAN results from Minneapolis, MN

Match #1: Grizzly Adam and NRA with 'The Alaskan Pitbull' Sarah Palin (SarahPAC) defeats 'Extreme Vegan' Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete with PeaceNick and Peta from PETA (Green World Order). PeaceNick attempted to chloroform NRA which brought Sarah Palin into the match. Palin broke her hockey stick over PeaceNick's head. NRA put Brock Cole Lee in the Gun Rack to score the win.

-------------

PCW Newsline: Gina Ramsey reviews the week's transactions:

Incoming:
Movie Classic signed on with PCW and will manage the Island of Misfit Wrestlers.

Also coming in:
-Dr. Mysterio
-Mr. Jaundice
-Captain Nausea

All three will join Movie Classic in the Island of Misfit Wrestlers

Outgoing:
Halitosis- 'The Luchador with the Insanely Foul Breath' will be taking a leave to go overseas for a few months.

Also leaving PCW for awhile:
-Union Jac
-DLC
-The American Bikers: Little Paulie and Big Paulie

Moving:
NRA jumps from Politically Incorrect to join SarahPAC.

Also moving within PCW:
-Politically Incorrect ('The Princess of Political Incorrectness' Andrea Doria, Al Cahall, and Nic Koteen) has joined up with the American Heartland Coalition

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Match #2: 'No Frills' Chris Escondido with 'Rahm-bo' Rahm Emanuel (Progressive Alliance) retains the PCW Television Title over Newt Tron Bomb with S.M. Art Bomb, Hy Drogen Bomb, and A. Tom Bomb. Escondido broke out some new moves in this match including his new finisher- the Cattle Mutilation, that finished N-Bomb off at the fourteen minute mark.

Post match: Former Domination Inc. member Daisy Cutter-Bomb again comes out and seeks the Bomb's forgiveness after saving H-Bomb from a Redneck 4-D deathblast...

Replay: 4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV- HY DROGEN BOMB and INCENDIARY BOMB w/S.M. Art Bomb (American Patriots) vs.'The Raving Rednecks' LOCKE AND LOADE (SarahPAC)
Suave: "Meanwhile...LOADE'S GOT A SUNSET FLIP! One...Two...NO! Just barely kicked out. LOCKE'S IN THE RING! YESSSSS! REDNECK 4-D DEATH BOMB! COVER. ONE...TWO...IT'S DAISY CUTTER-BOMB! SHE'S IN THE RING AND...HOLY CRAP! SHE JUST KICKED THE CRAP OUT OF LOADE! HOLD ON! I-BOMB HAS LOCKE ON THE TOP ROPE...YES! BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! COVER. ONE. TWO. THREE!

Again, the Bombs are hesitant to let her back in.

---------------

UPCOMING SHOWS

PCW would like to highlight the other e-federations who are out there. Please feel free to check them out:

WTF Intensity
April 26, 2009 from 9pm to 11pm – WTF Headquarters
King of Xtreme
May 3, 2009 all day – XWW arena
WTF Xtreme
May 3, 2009 from 9pm to 11pm – Energy Solutions Arena

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The Titan Zone A social network about e-wrestling. Meet and get to know the Titans of the e-wrestling world!

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Match #3 Steel Cage Grudge Match:
Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs.
PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin
Suave: "Johnny Suave along with P-SPAN Brian Lamb in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Last week on PCW on P-SPAN, Nancy Pelosi attempted to interfere in Tessa's match with Emily List of the Progressive Alliance and ended up getting smooshed by KRC and a steel folding chair. Last Wednesday on PCW Extreme Political TV, the feud went to another level."

Replay 4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV: Nancy Pelosi and Janeane Garofalo
...Pelosi: "Last week, that trailer trash redneck Andrea Doria and Politically Incorrect interfered with Emily List and Code Pink as they were trying to win the PCW Women's Title. As a result, the extremists from the American Heartland Coalition won." Garofalo: "Let’s be very honest about what this is about. It’s not about bashing the Progressive Alliance. The American Heartland Coalition doesn't support PCW CEO Barack Obama because they're straight up racists. They're nothing more but a bunch of teabagging rednecks just like former CEO George W was.” Suave: "WOW! Where did THAT come from? She has a right to her opinion but come on, that was hate filled bile." PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin comes out. Suave: "I wonder what the PCW Champion is going say about this." Tessa looks at Garofolo and Pelosi distainfully. She mouths 'you're not worth it' and leaves...

Suave: Later in the show, the situation escalated after W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad attacked Garofalo backstage...

Daily Kos: "American Heartland Coalition. Get your asses out here right now! W's flunkies! You, too." Suave: "Whoa. He's calling out both the A.H.C. and W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad." PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin leads out the American Heartland Coalition. 'The Mastermind' Karl Rove comes out with Andrew Card, Dana Perino, and Ari Fleischer. Daily Kos: "All right. You, Tessa Martin, are in co-hoots with Rove and his band of extremists." Tessa: "You know, I've just about had enough of you and your whacked out friends. You've come out here the last two weeks and accused the American Heartland Coalition of things that are flat out lies. You guys make me sick. You can take your-" Suave: "THAT'S JANEANE GAROFALO! SHE JUST TACKLED TESSA MARTIN AND WE HAVE OURSELVES A CAT-FIIIIIIGHT! CAT-FIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! ALL HELL'S BROKEN LOOSE! THE ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS AND THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION ARE GOING AT IT!" PCW Security Director Dawn McGill comes in again to restore order.

Suave: "Garofalo already in the ring. Here comes the PCW Women's champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin and she looks intense." Tessa climbs inside the cage. Suave: "Garofalo walks up to her and they are nose to nose." The bell rings. Lamb: "I must comment that these two ladies don't seem to like each other." Suave: "I think that's an understatement Brian. They lock up in the middle of the ring. AND GAROFALO PUSHES TESSA DOWN!" Tessa jumps right back up and gets back in Garofalo's face. Suave: "Tessa's not backing down...AND SHE PUSHED GAROFALO DOWN!" Garofalo lands in her corner and bounces off the turnbuckle. Tessa gestures to her to 'get up and come here.' Suave: "As I said, Tessa looks incredibly intense and focused. Garofalo with a wild swing! Tessa ducks under. Kick to the mid-section. Suplex! Tessa pulls her back up. SHE SLINGS HER RIGHT INTO THE CAGE!" Garofalo bounces off the steel cage and right back to Tessa who slings her into the other side of the cage. Garofalo bounces off the steel cage and right back to Tessa. Suave: "AGAIN INTO THE SIDE OF THE CAGE WITH GAROFALO!" Garofalo bounces off the cage and collapses in a heap.

Dick Cheney, carrying a barbed wire covered baseball bat, 'The Mastermind' Karl Rove, Dana Perino, Andrew Card, and Ari Fleischer aka W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad walk down to the ring. Suave: "What the hell are they doing here?" Tessa sees them and backs up. 'The Mastermind' Rove points to his temple to make sure everyone in the building knows he's a freakin' genius. Card produces a steel bolt cutter and snips off the lock to the cage. Cheney, Rove, etal then go inside. Suave: "THEY CUT THE LOCK OFF AND NOW THEY'RE INSIDE. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?" Garofalo looks up and sees Dick. She immediately jumps up from the canvas and lunges at Cheney. *WHAP* Suave: "HOLY CRAP! GAROFALO CHARGED DICK AND HE JUST BUSTED HER WIDE OPEN WITH THAT BARBED WIRE BAT!" Garofalo on the canvas bleeding profusedly from the forehead. Suave: "WHAT? DICK'S MOTIONING TO TESSA TO PIN GAROFALO?" Tessa bends down to check on her. She uses her shirt to wipe off some of the blood. Suave: "SHE'S NOT GOING ALONG WITH THIS. THE PCW WOMEN'S CHAMPION IS ACTUALLY TRYING TO HELP GAROFALO. SHE'S TRYING TO REVIVE HER."

Garofalo revives, sees Tessa, and kicks her across the ring. Suave: "WAIT A MINUTE. SHE WAS ONLY TRYING TO H-...TESSA'S PISSED. Kick to the mid-section. PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! COVER. ONE...TWO...THREE! THAT'S IT!"

Winner: 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin

Suave: "TESSA MARTIN GETS THE WIN AND...NOW WHAT? DICK CHENEY WANTS TO SHAKE TESSA'S HAND NOW? IS HE NUTS?" Dick thrusts his hand out to Tessa. Tessa looks around the crowd and gauges their response. Dick: "Shake my f***ing hand!" Tessa's eyes widen. Then she Pizza Cutters Dick. The crowd explodes. Suave: "PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! TESSA JUST PIZZA CUTTER'D DICK...NOW SHE'S BEING ATTACKED BY W'S IMAGE REHAB AND TRUTH SQUAD!" Card, Perino, Fleisher, and Rove beat down Tessa. 'The Queen of Political Extreme' Ann Coulter and former PCW Women's Champion Hallie Burton enter the cage. Coulter grabs Garofalo and handcuffs her to the side of the cage. Suave: "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? THE QUEEN OF POLITICAL EXTREME ANN COULTER HAS HANDCUFFED JANEANE GAROFALO TO THE CAGE. AND NOW, ARI FLEISCHER AND ANDREW CARD HAVE BROUGHT IN A BARREL FULL OF WATER? AND A BOARD? Oh...no." Burton pulls Tessa up and drapes her on the board. Perino handcuffs Tessa's arms behind her back around the board and Fleischer and Card lower her into the water. Suave: "NO! STOP THEM! THAT'S NOT RIGHT!" Lamb: "My God. Are they actually...waterboarding her?" Suave: "WHAT THE HELL DOES IT LOOK LIKE, BRIAN?" Suave jumps on top of the announcer's table. Suave: "DICK, THIS IS WRONG! STOP IT!" Dick sneers at Suave and has a microphone.

Dick: "Of course you would think that way, Suave. Because you're weak. You all are weak! When you face an enemy, do you worry about piddly little minute details such as the Geneva Convention?" Coulter takes a steel chair and blasts Garofalo with it. Suave: "HOLY CRAP! SHE'S KNOCKED OUT!" Dick: "F*** no! You do what you have to do to win. To project strength and to deter those who would harm you." Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Steny Hoyer run to the ring. Dick flips them off. Suave: "THIS IS JUST WRONG!" The board is pulled out of the barrel of water and laid on the canvas. Cheney, Card, Rove, Perino, etal then exit the cage. Dick again flips off Pelosi etal as they smugly walk to the back. Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean Up Crew quickly enter the ring and attend to Garofalo and Tessa.

-------------------

The E-Wrestling Magazine is the home for all the latest news on e-federations all across the country. Check out the latest stories:

Eight Random Roleplays 04.26.09 Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
SWF LIVE (Full Report) Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com Exclusive Web Show Airs! Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
4/25-PCW Extra: The Coleman/Franken Feud Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
All-Star Championship Wrestling 4/16/09 Report Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com to Air Two Matches Sunday! Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
The Big Shot 04.23.09 Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
BOB: Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #20 Results! Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
The E-Wrestling Rumor Mill #18 Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV: Nancy Pelosi, Janeane Garofalo Confront the American Heartlanders Wednesday, 22 April 2009 (/)
Final Judgment 29th April Wednesday, 22 April 2009 (/)
Just Wrestling: The Silver Lining Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
Dream Wrestling Talent Names Leaked Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
Seven Random Roleplays 04.19.09 Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
THE HYPE Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)

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Fed Wars.org - Fed Wars is an interfed promotion currently run by Ben Halkum. There are a number of e-feds already involved in this project.

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E-Wrestling Torch- E-fed television, pay-per-view, and classic show reviews!

-----------------

UPCOMING EVENTS:
4/29- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV

6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV

---------------------

Match #4-Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch:
NORM COLEMAN w/ 'Rahm-bo' Rahm Emanuel (American Patriots)

vs. AL FRANKEN w/ Eric Cantor (Progressive Alliance)
Suave: "If you want a recap on how the Franken/Coleman situation came to be, check out yesterday's PCW Extra with Gina Ramsey for the low-down on this highly volitile feud." Lamb: "It has been quite extradinary to say the least. We've never seen anything like it before and may never see anything like it again." Suave: "Very true, Brian. Very true. Both men are in the ring and they're already chirping back and forth at each other. A quick update on Janeane Garofalo and PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin. Both have been taken to the hospital but it looks like they're going to okay. I will say this, we've seen some extradinary things take place here in PCW. We've seen chloroform, hypnosis, tasers, extreme flatulence, weaponry of all sorts, jumper cables, and a powerful drug transmitted by human touch that causes temporary paralysis in the recipient. As extreme as these finishers may seem, we've never seen waterboarding used here in PCW. It'll be interesting to see how this shakes out in the next few weeks."

The bell rings. Suave: "And there's the bell. COLEMAN CHARGES! OH! FRANKEN WHIPS HIM INTO THE BARBED WIRE ROPES!" Coleman's face contorts with pain. Lamb: "Johnny, that seemed almost like a desperation move on Coleman's part." Suave: "I agree, Brian. It seems Coleman is incredulous that he's in this situation in the first place. He's unestimated Franken from the beginning and now I believe desperation has set in." Franken overpowers Coleman and pounds away on him. Rahm Emanuel pulls out a metal ladder and throws it in the middle of the ring. Franken sets up the ladder behind Coleman. Suave: "Franken going for a spear...GOT IT!" Coleman flies backfirst into the ladder! Franken gets the ladder and sets it up in the middle of the ring. Suave: "Franken's going to try to put Coleman away quickly...WAIT! IT'S TEXAS SENATOR JOHN CORNYN!" Cornyn pushes the ladder over with Franken on it. Suave: "HOLY CRAP! FRANKEN HIT THE BARBED WIRE ROPES CHEST FIRST! RAHM EMANUEL IN THE RING. F-BOMB ON CORNYN! EMANUEL GRABS COLEMAN! F-BOMB! EMANUEL DROPS A PAIR OF F-BOMBS AND HELPS FRANKEN OFF THE ROPES!"

Eric Cantor digs under the ring and produces a barbed wire covered board. Suave: "Franken covers. One...two... *WHAP* CANTOR BREAKS THE COUNT! AND HE JUST PORCUPINED FRANKEN WITH THAT BARBED WIRE COVERED BOARD...THERE'S EMANUEL AGAIN! CANTOR SWINGS AND MISSES. F-BOMB! F-BOMB!" Emanuel grabs the barbed wire board and grinds Cantor's face into it. Cantor screams in pain! Suave: "Holy crap! Whoa. Cantor's face is a freakin' mess." Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean Up Crew arrive and help Cantor to the back. Lamb: "I think Coleman's fired all his weapons now." Suave: "And now, Franken has the barbedwire bat. Well, this can't be good for Coleman." Franken swings and nails the crotch of Coleman. Lamb: "Yes. I see what you mean. May I?" Suave: "Certainly." Lamb: "Holy crap!" Suave: "That was pretty good."

Emanuel is back underneath the ring and he pulls out a 2x4 with barbed wire wrapped around it. Emanuel lights the 2x4 on fire! Suave: "Okay, that's definitely not good for Coleman." Franken swings and nails Coleman with the board! Suave: "HOLY CRAP! Coleman's on fire! EMTs rush in and put the fire out. Franken rolls Coleman over. Suave: "ONE...TWO...THREE!"

WINNER: AL FRANKEN

Suave: "HOLY CRAP! I THINK WE JUST ABOUT SAW EVERYTHING TONIGHT! WEDNESDAY NIGHT- PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV. WE'LL START SORTING ALL THIS OUT AND LOOK FORWARD TOWARDS JUNE 7TH AND PCW'S LOOSE CANNONS UNLEASHED 5!"

Saturday, April 25, 2009

4/25-PCW Extra: The Al Franken and Norm Coleman Feud


"Gina Ramsey here. The Franken/Coleman feud has at times dominated the landscape at Political Championship Wrestling over the past six months. The feud really didn't begin until October when they met for the first time. But it didn't really take off until PCW Extreme Election Night 2008 in November. Here's a look back at the feud from the beginning....


NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots) vs. AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance) from 10/7/08 PCW Extreme Political TV
Suave notes that Franken is the rookie here going up against an experience veteran in Coleman. Arianna Huffington is out hanging around Franken’s corner. She distracts Coleman and Franken takes advantage. Franken shoulder blocks him down and then chokes Coleman with his robe. Franken sets Coleman in the corner and then chokes him out with his boot. Whip off the ropes and Franken hits a leg whip. Huffington slides a chair in. Chairshot by Franken and then an arm bar. Knee by Coleman followed by a snap mare and back to the arm. Coleman finally escapes and slides out of the ring.

John McCain, leader of the American Patriots, now ringside and confers with Coleman. Back in the ring, he runs right into a clothesline. Franken follows with a dropkick. Kicks to the leg. Kicks to the back. Snap mare. Another kick to the back. Franken covers for 2. McCain in to break the count. Chairshot by McCain changes the momentum. Huffington on the ring apron and screaming at McCain. Coleman cranks on Franken’s knee and works into the reverse Indian deathlock. Barack Obama now down at the ring. Coleman rolls the Indian deathlock into a pinning combo. Obama in and pulls Coleman off. Franken to his feet. Shoulder ram by Coleman. Chops, rights, and uppercuts. Coleman rocks Franken. Wristlock and a twisting takedown. Coleman wrenches the wrist backwards and then stomps on the elbow. Coleman rolls into a cross arm breaker for one. Franken kicks his way out.

The crowd chants ‘PCW.’ Rights to Coleman. Cross face shots. Body kick by Coleman and back to the wristlock. Coleman adjusts to a hammerlock and works the other arm. Franken rolled into a pinning position for 2. Again, Obama breaks the count. Franken to his feet into a shoulder block by Coleman. Suplex try by Coleman countered by Franken. Coleman thrown out of the ring. Franken to the apron. Flying elbow drop from the ring. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Arianna Huffington sets a table up and Obama puts Coleman on it. McCain runs around the ring. Arianna latches on to him and holds on for dear life. Franken to the top. Sarah Palin hits the ring again with her hockey stick and whacks Franken in the back. Franken falls and hits hard on the floor. Joe Biden now to the ring. Obama and McCain get into it. Biden climbs up to the top rope. Palin starts towards him but Arianna gets in between her and Biden. Biden leaps and puts Coleman through the table. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Crowd: “PCW…PCW!” Biden rolls Coleman back into the ring. Then he rolls Franken back into the ring. Arianna and Palin rolls around on the ring canvas. Suave: “CAT-FIGHT! CAT-FIGHT!” Franken crawls over and covers Coleman. 1…2…3.

WINNER: AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance)

Suave: “WOW! Didn’t expect that. Al Franken proved to be a much tougher opponent than I originally thought he’d be. So far, not a good night for the American Patriots.

McCain looks extremely agitated at losing the match. He stalks to the back with Palin a step behind him.

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From 11/7 PCW EXTREME ELECTION NIGHT 2008:

Franken and Coleman reach the ring. Suave: “If the last match was a war, I hate to see how this one turns out. Both men don’t like each other. Is Coleman’s vast political experience enough to hold off Franken? Can Franken pull off a huge win and add to what has already been a huge night for the Progressive Alliance. And will we see Sarah Palin again in this match? We will find out in just a…SOMEONE’S RUNNING TO THE RING. WHO IS THAT? THAT’S DEAN BARKLEY THE INDEPENDENT. AND HE CAUGHT BOTH FRANKEN AND COLEMAN COMPLETELY BY SURPRISE. THERE’S A REF IN THE RING…HE’S CALLING FOR THE BELL!”

MATCH #5 Minnesota Street Brawl
AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance)
vs. NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots)
vs. DEAN BARKLEY (Independent)

Suave: “IT’S NOW A THREE WAY MINNESOTA STREET BRAWL!” Barkley starts the match with a back elbow smash to Franken. Then hard right hands to Coleman’s face. Coleman back into the corner. Barkley blatantly chokes him. Franken clobbers Barkley from behind. Coleman wisely ducks out to the outside to catch his breath. Franken throws Barkley out of the ring and then Coleman slams him into the ringpost. Coleman stomps and kicks Barkley. Barkley gouges him in the eyes. Franken, now out of the ring, throws Coleman into the ring steps and then clotheslines him over the steel barricade into the crowd. Crowd: “PCW…PCW…PCW!” They brawl in the crowd. Barkley comes up from behind and plants a steel folding chair over Franken’s head. Crowd: “PCW…PCW…PCW!”Coleman tries to go back towards the ring. He rams Barkley into the steel barricade, jumps the barricade, and then slingshots Barkley over the barricade into the ringpost. Coleman went up top and took too long. Franken grabs the ropes and crotches Coleman. He falls back in the ring. Franken hits a leg drop from the second ropes and then bites Coleman’s forehead. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” The fans again cheer. Coleman reverses a whip then hits a pumphandle slam. Barkley hits a low, low blow on Franken. Franken somehow gets back up and thumbs Barkley in the eye. Coleman rams Franken shoulder-first into the corner ring post. Coleman rolls up Barkley from behind and hooks the tights. 1…2…3.

DEAN BARKLEY ELIMINATED

Suave: “IT’S DOWN TO COLEMAN AGAINST FRANKEN!” Coleman drags Franken out of the ring and slams him into the guardrail. Franken counters, blocks a suplex, and drapes Coleman across the guardrail. Franken’s spin kick from the ring apron misses. Coleman moves out of the way and Franken crashes right-knee-first into the rail. Quick chair shots in succession leave Franken dazed and wondering what hit him. Back suplex by Coleman. Suave: “WAIT A MINUTE! HERE COMES SARAH PALIN! SHE SWINGS THE HOCKEY STICK…MISSES FRANKEN AND HITS COLEMAN!” Palin winks. Suave: “THAT’S NOT SARAH PALIN! IT’S TINA FEY FROM SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE AGAIN! HERE’S COMES THE REAL PALIN!” Sarah Palin runs in and tackles Fey. They roll around on the floor. Suave: “CATFIGHT! CATFIGHT!”

Franken nails Coleman with a road sign. He next pulls out a cheese grater and rubs it across Coleman’s forehead. Suave: “CHEESE GRATER! CHEESE GRATER! COLEMAN IS BADLY BUSTED OPEN!” Franken pulls a ladder from underneath the ring and clocks Coleman with it. Franken grabs a garbage can and drop toe holds Coleman onto it. Cover. Two count. Coleman staggers back up and Franken knocks him right back out with a steel chair. Crowd: "HOLY S@#$#... HOLY S@#$#." Franken puts Coleman on top of the ladder and climbs up on the corner turnbuckle. Franken leaps off the turnbuckle and crushes Coleman on the metal ladder. Crowd: "HOLY S@#$#... HOLY S@#$#." Franken covers. 1…2…3.

WINNER: AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance)

Suave: “THE PROGRESSIVE ALLIANCE SCORES ANOTHER VICTORY HERE IN AN EXTREME HARDCORE POLITICAL MATCH! WOW! It’s now 4 for the Progressive Alliance, 1 for the independents, and 0 for the American Patriots.”

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11/6/09 PCW NEWSLINE:
Tuesday night at PCW Extreme Election Night 2008, Norm Coleman and Al Franken went through an intense hardcore war…

...Franken pulls a ladder from underneath the ring and clock Coleman with it. Franken grabs a garbage can and drops toe holds Coleman onto it. Cover. Two count. Coleman staggers back up and Franken knocks him right back out with a steel chair. Crowd: "HOLY S@#$#... HOLY S@#$#." Franken puts Coleman on top of the ladder and climbs up on the corner turnbuckle. Franken leaps off the turnbuckle and crushes Coleman on the metal ladder. Crowd: "HOLY S@#$#... HOLY S@#$#." Franken covers. 1…2…3.

The issue was decided when Franken pinned Coleman…or was it?

After Extreme Election Night ended, this took place…

PARKING LOT- HACK’S RUSTY NAIL SALOON
Al Franken opens up his car door. He starts to get into his car when Norm Coleman slams the door shut on Franken’s left leg. Coleman opens the car door and pulls Franken out. Franken to the ground. Coleman kicks at Franken’s left leg. He kneels down and starts swinging away. Coleman drags Franken up and whips him headfirst into the driver’s side window. Franken staggers back and his left leg gives out. Coleman again pulls him back up and whips him headfirst into the window. Franken slides down the side of the car. Coleman then opens the door and rams it into Franken’s head. Franken is dragged back into his car with his left leg hanging out again. Coleman slams the car door repeatedly against Franken’s leg.

Finally, ‘American Screamer’ Howard Dean and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido of the Progressive Alliance tackle Coleman and drive him to the ground.

Does this set up a rematch? We will find out soon enough.

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11/13/08 PCW NEWSLINE:
Political Championship Wrestling announces: Al Franken vs. Norm Coleman- the rematch- will take place on the November 25th PCW Extreme Political TV.

After taking a savage beating on his leg, will Franken be ready for Coleman? Can Coleman take advantage of Franken’s leg? We’ll find out November 25th.

--------------

NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots) vs. AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance) from 11/25 PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV
Franken is fired up. Coleman sidesteps the initial charge and wastes no time attacking Franken’s bad leg. Suave: “Coleman with kicks to Franken and drives him down to one knee…LOW BLOW BY FRANKEN!” Franken does it a second time. Coleman’s turns white and tips over onto the canvas. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Franken flails on him. He pulls Coleman up by the hair and throws him through the ropes outside. Coleman topples out of the ring and onto the floor. Franken on the edge of the ring. Flying elbow. Coleman’s legs jerk up at impact and then slam back down. Franken again pulls Coleman up by the hair. Blatant choke. The referee tries to get in the middle but Franken isn’t letting go. Franken gets a chair. *CLANG* He takes out the referee. *CLANG* Down goes Coleman. Franken throws the chair down and again pulls Coleman back up. Chop across the chest. A second one. Franken whips Coleman into the steel guardrail. Coleman flips over the guardrail into the crowd. Suave: “This has been all Al Franken so far.”

Franken is handed a cup of beer. Beer shot to Coleman. Cookie sheet is next. *WHACK* The cookie sheet is bent at a ninety degree angle after Franken uses it. The crowd parts and creates a corridor as Franken pushes Coleman towards the concession stand. Franken throws Coleman head first into the edge of the stand. Coleman finally fights back and pushes Franken away. He tries to fire some shots at Franken. Franken goes hammerlock and then reverses into a side headlock. Coleman reverses into an arm wringer. Franken can't break the hold so he punches Coleman in the mouth. Franken grabs a squeeze bottle full of ketchup and squirts it in Coleman’s eyes. Franken again chokes out Coleman. Suave: “Coleman’s taken a lot of punishment. How much more can he…say, what is Mark Ritchie doing over there with that rope?” Ritchie throws a rope over a beam and catches it on the other side. Franken drives Coleman towards Ritchie. Franken gets another chair. *CLANG* Coleman staggers. Franken pushes him down at Ritchie’s feet. Ritchie loops the rope around Coleman’s feet. He pulls the rope on the other side and Coleman goes into the air feet first. Suave: “Well, this can’t be good.” Franken gets a chair, winds up, and whacks Coleman with it. Suave: “COLEMAN’S STRUNG UP LIKE A HUMAN PINATA AND FRANKEN’S GOING TO BEAT THE STUFFING OUT OF HIM! *CLANG* HOLY CRAP! *CLANG* The crowd roars. Suave: “A THIRD SHOT. COLEMAN’S A SITTING DUCK…OR A HANGING DUCK…OR WHATEVER…AND HERE COMES TIM PAWLENTY!” Pawlenty runs down and swipes the chair from Franken. *CLANG* Franken staggers backwards. Mark Ritchie makes a run at Pawlenty. *CLANG* And falls backward as well. Franken gets up and charges again. *CLANG* Franken pirouettes and then collapses. Suave: “TIM PAWLENTY CLEANS HOUSE. HE’S CUTTING DOWN COLEMAN AND I DON’T THINK COLEMAN KNOWS WHERE HE’S AT RIGHT NOW!” Pawlenty guides Coleman back towards the ring. Franken gets up a few seconds later. He stumbles towards the ring.

Coleman barely can make it over the steel guardrail. Franken gets his second wind and leaps the guardrail onto Coleman. Again, Franken flails wild punches. Franken pulls him back up. Drop toehold onto a chair. Coleman’s forehead is busted open again. Franken powerbombs Coleman through the timekeeper’s table. Franken stomps on him. He drags Coleman back up and takes him to the ring. Franken rolls Coleman in and climbs the ropes. Coleman gets up. Franken hits a missile drop kick from the top rope sending him right back down. Franken snapmares him into the corner. Huge knee strike. Franken again up top, double axehandle to Coleman. Coleman throws wild punches that miss by several miles. Clothesline by Franken. He covers. 1…2..no, two count. Franken stomps him repeatedly. Franken picks someone up the top turnbuckle. Superplex from the top rope. Cover 1…2…NO! Coleman’s foot is on the ropes. Franken getting a little frustrated. He yanks Coleman back in the ring and climbs up the top turnbuckle. Swanton splash by Franken! ONE… TWO…NO! Suave: “I thought Franken got him. But Coleman kicks out just in time.” Franken sets up for the Piledriver, but Coleman rolls through! Franken takes Coleman up top. Coleman fights off Franken. Half Nelson Suplex by Franken! Another cover. 1…2…again, Coleman kicks out. Franken slams his fist into the canvas. Small package by Franken. Suave: “FRANKEN ROLLS HIM UP. 1…2…3-NO! COLEMAN ROLLED HIM OVER! 1…2…3! HE’S DONE IT!

WINNER: NORM COLEMAN

Franken stands in middle of the ring in complete disbelief. Suave: “FRANKEN CAN’T BELIEVE IT! HE HAD HIM!” Franken stands in the ring with his arms outstretched. Suave: “HE COMPLETELY HAD HIM! FRANKEN HAD HIM PINNED BUT SOMEHOW, COLEMAN ROLLED FRANKEN OVER AND HE GETS THE WIN!” Franken looks over at Coleman. Coleman’s celebrating. An enraged Franken hits Coleman from behind and then throws him head first into the corner turnbuckle. He picks up the chair and jams it into the back of Coleman’s left knee. Coleman falls backward to the canvas. Suave: “FRANKEN’S SNAPPED! HE’S PISSED AND NOW SLAMMING THAT STEEL CHAIR INTO COLEMAN’S KNEE!” Three shots in a row. Tim Pawlenty hits the ring to stop him. Franken blasts him with the chair and sends Pawlenty flying across the ring. Franken throws the chair down and puts Coleman’s leg through it. Suave: “WHAT IS HE DOING? FRANKEN CLIMBING TO THE TURNBUCKLE!” Franken jumps onto the chair. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! FRANKEN’S TRYING TO SNAP HIS LEG LIKE A TWIG!” Coleman grabs his knee and violently writhes in pain. Franken grabs the leg and spins. Coleman: AGGGGGHHHH! Suave: “FIGURE-FOUR! FIGURE FOUR!” Coleman slams the mat with his hands. Suave: “HE’S TRYING TO CRIPPLE COLEMAN…HERE COMES THE RIGHT WING BRIGADIERS!” Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, and Ann Coulter hit the ring. Franken drops the hold and slides out of the ring. Suave: “TOO LATE, THOUGH. THE DAMAGE MAY ALREADY HAVE BEEN DONE!”

--------------

12/3 PCW NEWSLINE:
Breaking News: Norm Coleman and Al Franken will conclude their epic series of matches on 12/18 in a Steel Cage Ladder Deathmatch.

If the first two encounters took political extreme to a different level, what’s going to happen when Coleman and Franken step into a steel cage to finish off their feud with an extreme ladder match? The match has been signed according to PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama who worked with the PCW competition committee and current PCW CEO George W to put the match together.

The match will be held in Minnesota as part of a house show event to be called PCW-Completely Deranged.

More info to follow…

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12/8-PCW NEWSLINE:

PCW COMPLETELY DERANGED TO BE ON P-SPAN
PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama announced earlier today that next Thursday’s PCW Completely Deranged will be broadcast on P-SPAN, the political channel. P-SPAN’s very own Brian Lamb will be the special color commentator for the main event- the Steel Cage Ladder Deathmatch between Al Franken and Norm Coleman. You won’t want to miss that.

-----------------

STEEL CAGE LADDER DEATHMATCH: AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance) vs. NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots) from 12/18/08 PCW COMPLETELY DERANGED
Suave: “All right. The rules are as follows: the first man to climb up and grab the suitcase that’s hanging over the ring wins the match. Pins, submissions, count-outs do not count. Escaping the cage does not count. The only way to win is to grab the suitcase.” Both men inside the cage. Dueling chants of “**** him up Franken” and “**** him up Coleman” start. Immediately Franken attacks. The bell rings. Suave: “HERE WE GO! FRANKEN GOES RIGHT AFTER COLEMAN’S BAD LEG.” Kicks by Franken to the injured left knee. Coleman tries to get out of the ring but Franken yanks him back in. More kicks to the knee. Russian leg sweep by Franken. Suave: “FRANKEN IS NOT MESSING AROUND! HE’S GOING TO INCAPACITATE COLEMAN! BRIAN, WHAT DO YOU THINK?” Lamb: “Johnny, that’s pretty violent. Is this the norm for PCW events?” Suave: “Well…yes….HERE WE GO! FRANKEN’S GOT A CHAIR..” *CLANG* Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” *CLANG* Coleman stumbles back and falls through the ropes to the outside right back the announcer’s table. Lamb: “My God. He’s hurt. Should we help him?” Suave: “That’s probably not advisable, Brian…BECAUSE FRANKEN’S CLIMBED THE TOP ROPE….HE BRINGS THE HEAVY ELBOW DOWN ON COLEMAN!” Franken pulls Coleman up and slams him hard into the steel cage. Then into the ring post. Coleman’s legs are rubbery. Again, into the side of the cage. Again, into the ring post. Franken throws Coleman on the floor. He searches underneath the ring and finds a ladder. He pulls it out and then hoists it over the top rope into the ring. Suave: “THERE’S THE FIRST LADDER OF THE NIGHT! CAN FRANKEN CLIMB UP AND GRAB THE BRIEFCASE?” Franken sets the ladder up in the middle of the ring. He takes one step up and Coleman somehow crawls back into the ring. Franken takes a second step. Coleman is crawling right for the ladder. Franken hops down and kicks Coleman. He picks him up and drags him to the edge of the ring. Franken climbs out and then hops off the edge holding on to Coleman’s head and choking him on the top rope. Coleman whiplashes off the ropes and lands on his back. Suave: “COLEMAN’S IN BIG TROUBLE!” Franken back in. He goes for the Figure Four Leg Lock but Coleman kicks him away. Franken tries a second time and again, Coleman boots him across the ring. Franken climbs out to the edge and heads towards the corner turnbuckle. Coleman suddenly gets up and drop kicks Franken off the ring edge into the steel cage four feet away.

Suave: “HOLY CRAP! FRANKEN HIT THE BACK OF HIS HEAD ON THE STEEL CAGE!” Now it’s Franken in trouble. Coleman inexplicably ignores the ladder and climbs the corner turnbuckle. Suave: “MISSILE DROPKICK FROM THE TOP ROPE SENDS FRANKEN RIGHT BACK INTO THE STEEL CAGE!” Coleman checks under the ring for something. He has it and goes right to Franken. Suave: “CHEESE GRATER! CHEESE GRATER! AND FRANKEN IS BUSTED WIDE OPEN! THE MOMENTUM HAS CHANGED HANDS!” Coleman pulls out a second ladder from underneath the ring. He immediately jams it in Franken’s gut. Coleman whirls it around and connects again. Lamb: “Now, are all these weapons legal?” Suave: “Um…yes…*BONK* …SKILLET! SKILLET!” Coleman comes over to the announcer’s table and motions Lamb out of his chair. Lamb stands. Lamb: “What am I supposed to sit on?” Suave: “Here. Take mine.” Coleman takes Lamb’s chair and *CLANG* *CLANG* Suave: “COLEMAN JUST DRILLED FRANKEN WITH TWO CHAIR SHOTS IN A ROW.” Franken in trouble now. Coleman kicks to the knee. He places Franken leg through the chair. Suave: “HE’S GOING TO DO THE SAME THING FRANKEN DID TO HIM! HE’S GOING TO TRY AND BREAK HIS LEG!” Lamb: “Is that the right thing to do?” Suave: “Well, right and wrong get a little fuzzy in the heat of battle.” Coleman climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Suave: “HE JUMPS…FRANKEN MOVED! HOLY CRAP! COLEMAN JUST KILLED HIMSELF! HE MISSED COMPLETELY AND HIT THE FLOOR HARD!”

Franken crawls back into the ring. Suave: “Franken can’t even stand up.” Coleman also crawls back to the ring. Franken reaches the ladder. Coleman crawls into the ring. Suave: “Franken’s going up. But Coleman is right behind him.” Franken’s about two rungs ahead of Coleman as both climb up opposite sides of the ladder. Franken reaches the top rung first. Coleman’s close enough to where he can start swinging at Franken. Both men try to push each other off the ladder. Franken stands and grabs for the briefcase. Coleman stands and he tries to reach the briefcase. Both latch on to the briefcase at the same time. The ladder suddenly becomes unbalanced. Both Franken and Coleman try to push the other off. Both grab at the briefcase. Lamb: “Isn’t it dangerous for two men to climb up a ladder to try to grab an object suspended in the air?” Suave: “Yes. That’s why you don’t see many ladder- HOLY CRAP! THE LADDER’S FALLING…RIGHT FOR US! BRIAN GET OUT OF THE WAY!” Lamb: “Huh? What?”

Crowd: “HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...“HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...HOLY…PCW!...PCW!...PCW!...PCW!...PCW!...” Suave: “Am I on…hello…okay…THE LADDER TIPPED OVER. FRANKEN AND COLEMAN FOUGHT FOR POSSESSION OF THE BRIEFCASE AS THE LADDER FELL. THE BAD NEWS- THEY JUST DESTROYED THE ANNOUNCER’S TABLE. THE GOOD NEWS- SOMETHING SOFT BROKE THEIR FALL. THE BAD NEWS- BRIAN LAMB OF P-SPAN WAS THE SOFT THING THAT BROKE THEIR FALL. I DIDN’T SEE WHO HAD WHAT. THE REFEREE IS TRYING TO SORT THIS OUT. THE CROWD IS GOING ABSOLUTELY NUTS!...HUH?...OH…OKAY…THE REFEREE IS GOING TO ANNOUNCE THE WINNER…LET’S GO TO THE RING.” Referee: “Okay. This is what I saw. Norm Coleman had possession-” The crowd explodes. Pro-Coleman and Franken chants erupt. Suave: “COLEMAN HAS BEEN DECLARED THE WINNER! THE REFEREE SAW THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AND CALLED HIM THE WINNER! FRANKEN IS PISSED. HE IMMEDIATELY CONFRONTS THE REFEREE AND HE’S LIGHTING HIM UP! COLEMAN’S OUT OF HERE. HE TOOK THE BRIEFCASE AND LIMPED OUT OF THE CAGE AS QUICKLY AS HE COULD. WHAT? FRANKEN’S CLAIMING THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AT THE BOTTOM BUT COLEMAN TOOK IT AWAY WHEN THE REFEREE CAME! THEY’RE GOING TO HAVE TO SORT THIS ONE OUT. COLEMAN THE WINNER. BUT MAJOR, MAJOR CONTROVERSY AT THE END OF THE THIRD COLEMAN-FRANKEN MATCH. THIS IS JOHNNY SUAVE FOR AN UNCONSCIOUS BRIAN LAMB, THANKS TO P-SPAN…SORRY ABOUT BRIAN…WE’LL HEAR MORE ABOUT THIS AS IT DEVELOPS.”

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12/20/08 PCW NEWSLINE

JOINT STATEMENT BY PCW CEO GEORGE W. AND PCW CEO-DESIGNATE BARACK OBAMA CONCERNING CONTROVERSIAL ENDING TO COLEMAN/FRANKEN III THURSDAY NIGHT
As everyone is aware, a huge controversy has erupted over The end of the Norm Coleman/Al Franken Steel Cage Ladder Deathmatch. Norm Coleman was declared the winner after the ladder that both he and Al Franken were on toppled over with both men fighting for the briefcase. At that time, the referee determined that Coleman and Franken simultaneously grabbed the suitcase which meant that whomever had control of the suitcase when they hit the ground would win the match. When the referee went over to the announcer’s table, he saw that Coleman had clear possession of the briefcase and called it accordingly.

However, Al Franken strenuously contends that he had possession of the briefcase when they hit the ground and that Coleman took it away from him just as the referee arrived on scene. We have no way to confirm this because both P-SPAN camera covering the event were on the other side of the ring. When the ladder went down, it went down going away from the camera which meant that there was a time period where both wrestlers disappeared from view.

As of right now, the call made on the scene stands. However, PCW will investigate Mr. Franken’s claims and try to locate any evidence that might indicate that he in fact did have possession of the briefcase when they hit the ground. If we can find such evidence, we will overturn the decision made by the referee and award the match to Mr. Franken. We hope to have some type of decision made as early as Tuesday night’s PCW Extreme Political TV.

----------------

FRANKEN/COLEMAN DECISION From 12/23/08 PCW Extreme Political TV
W.:
“All right, y’all. CEO-Designate Obama and I have come out to here announce that we’ve made a decision concerning-” W stops when the bickering going on behind him between Joe Biden and Dick heats up. Biden sticks his finger in Dick’s chest. Dick wags his finger right back at Biden. W: “Um, guys. Do you mind?” Biden and Dick sheepishly walk to opposite sides. W: “As I was saying, we’ve made a decision about the Al Franken/Norm Coleman controversy last Thursday. As you already know, the referee made the call Thursday night that because he saw Norm Coleman with possession of the briefcase, he was awarded the match. However, certain evidence has come to light. Barack? Obama: “Thank you, W. Chris Stellar from the Minnesota Independent came forward with his cell phone camera that recorded what happened as the ladder fell with both Coleman and Franken on it.

CELL PHONE CAMERA ACCOUNT
Coleman and Franken battle. They both grab the suitcase. The ladder becomes unstable and starts to fall. Both men wrestle in the air for possession of the briefcase. The ladder falls directly towards PCW Announcer Johnny Suave’s table. Suave and guest color analyst Brian Lamb from P-SPAN see the ladder falling. Suave dives out of the way. Lamb attempts to cushion the fall. The ladder stops at the ropes and both Coleman and Franken go through the table. Franken clearly has possession of the briefcase. The referee slides out of the ring. Coleman snatches the briefcase away…

Obama: “So, as you can see. We have indisputable proof that Al Franken had possession of the briefcase when both men hit the floor. George W. and I have conferred and we both agree that the only fair thing to do is to award the match to Al Franken.Half the crowd roars. The other half boos. Suave: “THERE YOU HAVE IT! AL FRANKEN IS THE WINNER OF THURSDAY NIGHT’S STEEL CAGE LADDER DEATHMATCH!” Coleman is pissed. He and Franken begin to talk. It quickly becomes heated. Franken taunts Coleman. Coleman attacks Franken. Suave: “HERE WE GO AGAIN!” Both W and Obama clear the ring. Suave: “COLEMAN HAS GONE BERSERK! HE IS PUMMELING FRANKEN…WAIT! HERE COMES THE PCW SECURITY DIRECTOR- SIX FOOT DEMOLITION MACHINE IN A SHORT SKIRT- DAWN McGILL!” McGill and her Singapore cane climb into the ring. She drags Coleman away from Franken. Coleman fights it. McGill Russian Leg Sweeps Coleman with the cane and he falls backwards. Suave: “McGILL TRYING TO BREAK THIS UP. SHE TELLS COLEMAN TO GET OUT OF THE RING. FRANKEN TAUNTS COLEMAN! COLEMAN SNAPS RIGHT UP. McGILL AGAIN PULLS COLEMAN AWAY! FRANKEN CONTINUES TO TAUNT COLEMAN! COLEMAN PUSHES FRANKEN! FRANKEN SLAPS…OHHHH, NO. COLEMAN DUCKS AND FRANKEN SLAPS DAWN McGILL!” McGill’s eyes blaze with fury. She immediately heaves Coleman head first out of the ring. Then she starts slowly towards Franken. Suave: “Al, you just made one of the biggest mistakes ever in your life…and yes, that includes Stuart Smalley- the movie. This gal has sterilized more men with her six inch stilettos than most doctors do in a career.” Backpedeling, Franken tries to apologize. *THWACK* Apparently, it’s not accepted. *THWACK* Franken spins and falls to the canvas. Suave: “Well, I guess Dawn McGill passed her first test as the PCW Security Director!”

---------------

For four months, the feud simmered on the back burner. But when Franken and Coleman were brought together to accept an award for PCW's best feud of 2008...

---------------

From 4/7/09 PCW Extreme Political TV:

BANQUET ROOM
During the year end PCW awards ceremony for 2008, PCW CEO Barack Obama has just announced the winner of '2008's Best Feud'- Al Franken vs. Norm Coleman. Franken and Coleman come up on opposite sides. Obama: "This feud took off at PCW Extreme Election Night and ended with a thrilling, heartstopping ladder cage match in Minneapolis at PCW Completely Deranged. Let's give these two combatants a hand for bringing some great moments to PCW." The audience stands up and cheers. Franken and Coleman both acknowledge the crowd. The roaring ovation continues and drowns out Franken and Coleman chirping back and forth at each other. It becomes more heated. Coleman lunges across the dias and tackles Franken...

Suave: "Apparently after all these months and Coleman's endless appeals to the PCW Competition Committee of the decision on the ladder cage match, they still don't like each other."

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From 4/12 PCW On P-SPAN: PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein interviews Al Franken of the Progressive Alliance.
Bernstein asks Franken about Tuesday night. Franken replies that Norm Coleman is just bitter and desperate to win at any cost. "The tape said it all," Franken says- alluding to a tape made at the PCW Completely Deranged event in Minneapolis that showed Franken with the briefcase at the end of their ladder match when they hit the ground.

Coleman runs in, says 'That's a lie!' and tackles Franken. PCW Security Director Dawn McGill and a few others come out to break up the fracas.

--------------

Suave: "Well, Al Franken's in the ring and has something to say. If you've been following the whole Franken-Norm Coleman situation, they were together to accept an award last week for the best feud in PCW for 2008. As if on cue, Franken and Coleman scuffled at the dias and the feud seems to have fired back up. Let's see what Al has to say." Franken: "Okay. This week, Norm Coleman's umpteenth appeal of the decision made by the full PCW Competition Committee to award me, Al Franken, the win of our December 18th match at PCW Competely Deranged was turned down again. Let's see the tape of what happened and what really happened..."

REPLAY FROM 12/18 PCW COMPLETELY DERANGED: ENDING OF AL FRANKEN/NORM COLEMAN MATCH
Suave: “Yes. That’s why you don’t see many ladder- HOLY CRAP! THE LADDER’S FALLING…RIGHT FOR US! BRIAN GET OUT OF THE WAY!” Lamb: “Huh? What?”

Crowd: “HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...“HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...HOLY ****!...HOLY…PCW!...PCW!...PCW!...PCW!...PCW!...” Suave: “Am I on…hello…okay…THE LADDER TIPPED OVER. FRANKEN AND COLEMAN FOUGHT FOR POSSESSION OF THE BRIEFCASE AS THE LADDER FELL. THE BAD NEWS- THEY JUST DESTROYED THE ANNOUNCER’S TABLE. THE GOOD NEWS- SOMETHING SOFT BROKE THEIR FALL. THE BAD NEWS- BRIAN LAMB OF P-SPAN WAS THE SOFT THING THAT BROKE THEIR FALL. I DIDN’T SEE WHO HAD WHAT. THE REFEREE IS TRYING TO SORT THIS OUT. THE CROWD IS GOING ABSOLUTELY NUTS!...HUH?...OH…OKAY…THE REFEREE IS GOING TO ANNOUNCE THE WINNER…LET’S GO TO THE RING.” Referee: “Okay. This is what I saw. Norm Coleman had possession-” The crowd explodes. Pro-Coleman and Franken chants erupt. Suave: “COLEMAN HAS BEEN DECLARED THE WINNER! THE REFEREE SAW THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AND CALLED HIM THE WINNER! FRANKEN IS PISSED. HE IMMEDIATELY CONFRONTS THE REFEREE AND HE’S LIGHTING HIM UP! COLEMAN’S OUT OF HERE. HE TOOK THE BRIEFCASE AND LIMPED OUT OF THE CAGE AS QUICKLY AS HE COULD. WHAT? FRANKEN’S CLAIMING THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AT THE BOTTOM BUT COLEMAN TOOK IT AWAY WHEN THE REFEREE CAME!"

CELL PHONE CAMERA ACCOUNT
Coleman and Franken battle. They both grab the suitcase. The ladder becomes unstable and starts to fall. Both men wrestle in the air for possession of the briefcase. The ladder falls directly towards PCW Announcer Johnny Suave’s table. Suave and guest color analyst Brian Lamb from P-SPAN see the ladder falling. Suave dives out of the way. Lamb attempts to cushion the fall. The ladder stops at the ropes and both Coleman and Franken go through the table. Franken clearly has possession of the briefcase. The referee slides out of the ring. Coleman snatches the briefcase away…

Franken: "So, the tape clearly shows that I, Al Franken, had the briefcase when we hit the ground and that Norm Coleman took the briefcase away from me, Al Franken, before the referee came around. Norm? I know you're out there somewhere. It's time to give it up. You've lost. I, Al Franken, have won." Norm Coleman slowly walks towards the ring. Suave: "There he is. Norm Coleman. Will he finally give it up? What will he do? Let's find out." Coleman climbs in the ring. Coleman: "Al, this is not pro wrestling fast food. I'm taking this all the way to the top." Franken: "What. You're taking this to PCW Owner Bubba Jackson?" Coleman: "Yes." Franken: "Norm, enough is enough. I, Al Franken, won. You lost." Coleman: "Like hell I will." Coleman lunges at Franken. Suave: "HERE WE GO AGAIN! FRANKEN AND COLEMAN ARE THROWING EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK AT EACH OTHER!" PCW Security Director Dawn McGill charges to the ring to break up the fracas.

---------------------

From 4/19- PCW on P-SPAN...

Progressive Alliance personality Al Franken arrives outside the arena with P.A. Executive Director Tim Kaine. Franken smiles until he's attacked from the air by Norm Coleman leaping from the roof of a car. Coleman slams Franken's head into the driver's side car window and shatters the glass. Kaine whaps Coleman with his briefcase. Newly hired American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor flies in and tackles Kaine.

PCW Security Director Dawn McGill arrives on scene and throws Coleman to the ground. Cantor gets in her face and receives a four inch stiletto heel to the groin from McGill.

Back inside, PCW CEO Barack Obama is in the ring and furious at Coleman's attack. Obama gets ready to lay down the law when PCW Owner Bubba Jackson makes a surprise appearance. Jackson takes the microphone and states he's tired of Coleman and Franken dragging this on and on and on. Jackson: "I could make a ruling on Coleman's appeal to me but I think I have a better idea. Next week on PCW on P-SPAN, we will have in our main event Norm Coleman of the American Patriots versus Al Franken of the Progressive Alliance to settle their differences once and for all in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch!"

---------------

So there you have it. Tomorrow night this feud ends once and for all. Franken versus Coleman in a Hardcore Steelcage Deathmatch. From Political Championship Wrestling

Friday, April 24, 2009

4/25-PCW Newsline:


Hey y'all. Gina Ramsey here with this week's Political Championship Wrestling Newsline. Here's what's in the news in PCW:

PCW Extreme Political TV Recap/PCW Wrestler of the Week/PCW Transactions/A Preview of Sunday Night's PCW on P-SPAN/Upcoming Events.


Also, we'll also have a special PCW Extra featuring the Franken/Coleman feud today.

Recap of 4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV

-Nancy Pelosi and Janeane Garofalo came out and trashed the American Heartland Coalition. PCW Women's Champion 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin came out and left.

-Domination Inc's new WMD Big Monster Wahlie easily dispatched Michael Hunt (Island of Misfit Wrestlers).

-Former Domination Inc. member Daisy Cutter-Bomb asked for forgiveness from her brothers Hy Drogen Bomb and Incendiary Bomb.

-Movie Classic makes his debut in PCW and tries to rally the Island of Misfit Wrestlers.

-Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots) def. SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) when the Island of Misfit Wrestlers, led by Movie Classic, hit the ring and interfered, costing SNAFU the match.

-The Angry Left Wing Bloggers find Garofalo lying unconscious on the floor with the letter 'W' spraypainted on her back. They call out both the American Heartland Coalition and W's Image Rehab and Truth Squad and demand to find out who did it. Garofalo attacks 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin and a cage match is set for Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN

-Main event: H-Bomb and I-Bomb (American Patriots) def. the Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade

-------------

PCW WRESTLER OF THE WEEK: MOVIE CLASSIC
Newcomer Movie Classic made a huge impact heard in PCW Wednesday night by cutting a killer promo and leading the Island of Misfit Wrestlers to a little revenge on Dr. Bill.

Movie Classic Promo from 4/22 PCW Extreme Political TV
A guy wearing sunglasses and a tacky sports coat walks in. MAN: "Look at this dressing room. I see dead people. Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." Jimmy: "Who are you?" MAN: "I'm Movie Classic. Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make?" Snott: "What. Listen to children do what? What are you talking about?" DVD: "Really. Just leave us alone to our fate." Dredd Pirate Dougie: "War's over, man. Dr. Bill dropped the big one on us." Movie Classic: "Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!" Richard Headd: "Germans?" Dr. Rectum: "Shhhh, he's rolling." Movie Classic: "And it ain't over now. 'Cause when the goin' gets tough..." A long pause follows. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers wait...and wait...and wait for him to finish the sentence. Movie Classic: "...the the tough get goin'! Who's with me? Let's go!" Movie Classic bounds out of the locker room- no one follows him.

Then he returns. Movie Classic: "What the f*** happened to the Island of Misfit Wrestlers I used to watch? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts, huh? This could be the greatest night of our lives, but you're gonna let it be the worst. "Ooh, we're afraid to go with you Movie Classic, we might get our asses kicked again. Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this. Dr. Bill, he's a dead man! SNAFU, dead! Domination Inc... Dr. Ivan Rectum stands up. Dr. Rectum: DEAD! Movie Classic's right. Psychotic, but absolutely right. We gotta take these bastards. Now we could do it with conventional weapons that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody's part." The other members of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers nod in agreement. Richard Headd: "And we're just the guys to do it!" DVD: "LET'S DO IT!" Movie Classic: "LET'S DO IT!"

Replay of SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) vs. NEWT TRON BOMB w/S.M. Art Bomb (American Patriots) match from 4/22 PCW Extreme Political TV
Suave: "N-BOMB IS IN TROUBLE! MOONSAULT PRESS ON THE WAY...NAILED IT! COVER. ONE...TWO...N-BOMB GETS HIS SHOULDER UP!" Dr. Bill slides a chair in the ring. Suave: "SNAFU sets the chair up for the Triple Jump Moonsault. WAIT A MINUTE! HOLY CRAP! JIMMY FROM SO CAL JUST PUSHED SNAFU OFF TH ROPES!" Movie Classic comes up to Dr. Bill. Movie Classic: "Say hello to my little friends!" Richard Headd, Snott Flemmstein, and Dredd Pirate Douggie tackle Dr. Bill.

Suave: "IT'S THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS! THEY'RE PUMMELING DR. BILL!" SNAFU is up and staggers towards the ring. Suave: "S.M. ART BOMB THROWS SNAFU BACK IN THE RING. N-BOMB STICK HIS BUTT IN HIS FACE. OOOOOHHHH! ICK! SILENT BUT DEADLY! SILENT BUT DEADLY! N-BOMB COVERS. ONE. TWO. THREE!"


WINNER: NEWT TRON BOMB

Suave: "Movie Classic leads the Island of Misfit Wrestlers to get their revenge on Dr. Bill for leading them to be slaughtered by Domination Inc. last Sunday. AND THEY'RE NOT DONE YET! THEY'VE SET UP A TABLE AND DRAPED DR. BILL ON IT. DVD TO THE TOP ROPE. HE JUMPS. HE MISSES! OW! ALL RIGHT, HERE'S DREDD PIRATE DOUGGIE. *CRUNCH* HOLY CRAP!" Dr. Bill is driven through the table. Another PCW chant starts up.


------------

PCW TRANSACTIONS
Here's the comings and goings in Political Championship Wrestling this week:

Incoming: Movie Classic signed on with PCW and will manage the Island of Misfit Wrestlers. Also coming in:
-Dr. Mysterio
-Mr. Jaundice
-Captain Nausea

All three will join Movie Classic in the Island of Misfit Wrestlers

Outgoing: Halitosis- 'The Luchador with the Insanely Foul Breath' will be taking a leave to go overseas for a few months.
Also leaving PCW for awhile:
-Union Jac
-DLC
-The American Bikers: Little Paulie and Big Paulie

Moving: NRA jumps from Politically Incorrect to join SarahPAC.
Also moving within PCW:
-Politically Incorrect ('The Princess of Political Incorrectness' Andrea Doria, Al Cahall, and Nic Koteen) has joined up with the American Heartland Coalition

---------------------

PREVIEWING THE CARD FOR 4/26 PCW on P-SPAN SHOW:
-The Green World Order (Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete w/PeaceNick and Peta from PETA) vs. Grizzly Adam and NRA w/'The Alaskan Pitbull' Sarah Palin (SarahPAC)

-Non Title Cage Match: Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs. 'Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl' Tessa Martin (c)

-PCW Title Match: 'No Frills' Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance) vs. Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)

-Hardcore Steel Cage Deathmatch: Norm Coleman (American Patriots) vs. Al Franken (Progressive Alliance)

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UPCOMING EVENTS:
4/26- PCW on P-SPAN
4/29- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV

6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV

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http://twitter.com/PCWPolWrestling

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