Thursday, January 29, 2009

1/29-PCW Newsline: Huge Week for the Innovator of Extreme Broadcast Excellence Rush Limbaugh, Post PCW Extreme Political TV Notes, BWE Preview

1/29- PCW NEWSLINE

RESULTS FROM TUESDAY NIGHT’S PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV:

-‘The Innovator of Extreme Broadcast Excellence’ Rush Limbaugh and the ‘Queen of Political Extreme’ Ann Coulter come out to say ‘we told you so.’ They accuse John McCain of destroying the American Patriots and rail against the ‘socialism’ that Barack Obama allegedly wants to bring to PCW. Obama walks out and tells Limbaugh to choose a wrestler and there will be a match on next week’s PCW Extreme Political TV.

-Dave the Mechanic (Joe SixPacks) pins Snott Flemmstein (Jobbers) after whapping him with Tequila Sheila’s blender. After the match, Dr. Bill rolls out with the other PCW jobbers and they all attack Dave. Kevin Scott, Average Joe, American Trucker, and PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl Tessa Martin come to the rescue for Joe SixPacks.

-The Schett Brothers deliver a promo and tell PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (Domination Inc.) that they can run but they can hide.

-Quadruple R (Domination Inc.) annihilates Average Joe (Joe SixPacks) after DDT’g him on a chair. No interference at all from Domination Inc.

-Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen with Elisabeth Hasselbeck from ‘The View’ in her corner (American Patriots) quashes an injured Code Pink with Joy Behar (Progressive Alliance), also from ‘The View’, with the Eskimo Pieface. Post match, Hasselbeck and Behar catfight which brings out the Angry Left Wing Bloggers and, in turn, Politically Incorrect. The referee calls for the bell and it’s an impromptu 8 man tag team match

-Politically Incorrect (Al Cahall, Nic Koteen, NRA, and Hunter the Hunter) w/the ‘Queen of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria defeat the Angry Left Wing Bloggers (Daily Kos, Eric Alterman, Media Matters for America, and News Hounds) w/Professor Paul Krugman in a brutal, extreme tag team war when NRA blasts Daily Kos in the head with the butt end of a shotgun.

-Rush Limbaugh chooses Quadruple R from Domination Inc. to be his representative next week against PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama.

POST SHOW NOTES:
-Rush Limbaugh seemed very pleased with how the night went. It is not clear right now if he is officially going to align himself, and quite possibly the American Patriots, with Domination Inc. The word going around is that Limbaugh, for lack of anyone else stepping up, is more or less the de facto leader of the American Patriots right now. Could the American Patriots be headed for conflict between the Limbaugh wing and the McCain wing?

-On the other hand, PCW CEO Barack Obama and the Progressive Alliance are very nervous about the match. Quadruple R probably has the most talent of any wrestler on the PCW roster but his emotions have tended to get the better of him. PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama continues to improve rapidly with the help of former PCW Champion Justin Sufferable but if Quadruple R has his head together and can keep in control, this could be Bahama’s toughest title defense in his short reign as champion.

-The story about how the rest of the PCW Jobbers (Snott Flemmstein, Jimmy from So Cal, signed up with self-help guru Dr. Bill is this: given the success FUBAR (now Kevin Scott) and SNAFU has had under Dr. Bill’s tutelage, the whole lot of them showed up in his office last week and begged him to help them out.

-The Schett Brothers are itching to get their hands on Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit. Several members of the Progressive Alliance had to stop them from crashing Domination Inc’s suite Tuesday night and going after the PCW Tag Team Champions.

-After having her fur coat burned up at the hands of Peta from PETA, ‘The Queen of Political Correctness’ Andrea Doria went coat shopping earlier today. She promises to have a brand new coat on next week on PCW Extreme Political TV.
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Check out our good friends over at Blog Wrestling Entertainment for BWE Throwdown.
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MAIN EVENT: fragnoli vs mojomike: This is more than just two legendary bloggers going at it. There are stipulations in this match to go along with bragging rights. If fragnoli wins this match, he'll be back in the BWE Championship picture in a Triple Threat bout involving mojomike and Mo Morrissey at No Recovery! If mojomike wins, fragnoli can never challenge either Mo or Mojomike for the BWE Championship.

MONDAY, WE’LL HAVE WEEKEND HOUSE SHOW NEWS, BWE RESULTS, AND A PREVIEW OF PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘The New Rookie Sensation’ O’Beck Bahama (Progressive Alliance)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Kevin Scott (Joe Sixpacks)
#2- ‘The Angry Highway Warrior’ Quadruple R (Domination, Inc.)

PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: Kathryn Randall Collins (Domination, Inc.)
CONTENDERS:
#1- ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl Tessa Martin (Joe Sixpacks)
#2- Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen (American Patriots)
PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (Domination, Inc.)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Schett Brothers- Jack Schett and Bull Schett (Progressive Alliance)#2- A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (American Patriots)

PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance)CONTENDERS:
#1- Dave the Mechanic (Joe Sixpacks)
#2- SNAFU (Independent)
UPCOMING SCHEDULE OF EVENTS:
2/2- PCW Newsline
2/3- PCW Extreme Political TV
2/6- PCW Newsline
2/9- PCW Newsline
2/10- PCW Extreme Political TV
2/13- PCW Newsline
2/16- PCW Newsline
2/17- PCW Extreme Political TV

PREVIOUS SHOWS AND NEWSLINES:
1/27- PCW Extreme Political TV: Rush Limbaugh Challenges PCW CEO Barack Obama, Politically Incorrect vs. The Angry Left Wing Bloggers
1/26- PCW Newsline: Domination Inc. Board Meeting, ‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews and Newsweek’s Jonathan Alter Attack Sarah Palin
1/22- PCW Newsline: PCW Night of Champions Results, Obama Takes Oath of Office Again, Rahm Emanuel Named Progressive Alliance Wrestling Leader
1/20- PCW Night of Champions- Hour 2: Rahm Emanuel aka…Rahmbo Debuts, O’Beck Bahama Retains PCW Title, George W. Leaves For the Final Time
1/20- PCW Night of Champions- Hour 1: Barack Obama Assumes PCW CEO Post, Sarah Palin and the Eskimo Queen vs. Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Paul Krugman, Domination Inc. Gives is Given Ultimatum
1/19- PCW Newsline: Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman Attack Sarah Palin Yet Again, Politically Incorrect Returns, PCW Night of Champions Preview
1/17- Sarah Palin Models the New PCW Jersey
1/15- PCW Newsline: Recap of PCW Extreme Political TV, PCW Competition Committee to Close Loophole Found by Domination Inc., Looking Back at George W’s Reign Over PCW
1/13- PCW Extreme Political TV: Keith Olbermann and Arianna Huffington Vow to Destroy Sarah Palin, Code Pink Debuts, American Patriots Leadership Candidates Meet with What’s Left of the American Patriots
1/12- PCW Newsline: Keith Olbermann and Professor Paul Krugman Attack Sarah Palin Again at PCW House Show, Domination Inc. Board Meeting, Preview of 1/13- PCW Extreme Political TV
1/8- PCW Newsline: PCW Owners Bubba Jackson and DeWayne Cantrell, Keith Olbermann Attacks Sarah Palin at PCW House Show

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LINKS:
Buckland County Gazette

Political Championship Wrestling at Blogspot

Political Championship Wrestling at Wordpress

American Heartland Bar and Grill

Prairie Depot Press at Blogspot

Screw the BCS at Blogspot

Exploding Sheep Productions

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

1/27-PCW Extreme Political TV: Rush Limbaugh Challenges PCW CEO Barack Obama, Politically Incorrect vs. The Angry Left Wing Bloggers

Last Week at PCW Night of Champions:
-The PCW Competition Committee updated the PCW rules to close a loophole found by Domination Inc’s Corporate Attorneys Felcher and Felcher. The Committee ruled that PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins (Domination Inc) and PCW Tag Team Champs Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (Domination Inc) had to put their title on the line tonight.

-Another look at the new PCW Jersey as modeled by Sarah Palin

-PCW Owner Bubba Jackson stumbled a bit but managed to give Barack Obama the oath and he becomes the new PCW CEO.

-Domination Inc comes out and demands that Obama veto the PCW Competition Committee’s plan to close the loophole. Obama refuses. Domination Inc threatens to walk out. Obama tells them to leave their belts because a no-show automatically forfeits the title.

-Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen and Alaskan Pitbull Sarah Palin (American Patriots) wrestle to no-decision with Code Pink and Emily List (Progressive Alliance) when Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman and the Angry Left Wing Bloggers interfere causing the ‘Queen of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria and Politically Incorrect to come out to even the odds.

-Domination Inc meet in their suite. Quadruple R goes crazy and wants to kick some butt. Mr. McMann turns him loose to do so.

-PCW Television Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance) defeats Dave the Mechanic (Joe SixPacks) when Rahm Emanuel aka…Rahmbo debuts and helps Escondido get the ankle lock on Dave.

-PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins aka…KRC (Domination Inc) pinned ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Joe SixPacks) when Quadruple R hit Tessa with a steel folding chair from behind. A huge brawl broke out between Domination Inc and Joe SixPacks and PCW Security Director Dawn McGill came out and cleaned house. She nailed Big Oil in the groin with her 4 inch stilettos and takes out most of Domination Inc with her Singapore cane. Mr. McMann is not pleased.

-PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit retained their title after losing by count out to Jack Schett and Bull Schett. When the bell rung, Big Oil and Walstreit simply walked out with the rest of Domination Inc.

-Former PCW CEO George W is jeered by Obama fans as he leaves Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon for the final time.

-PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama (Progressive Alliance) pinned a weakened Kevin Scott (Joe SixPacks). Scott had been tasered by Rough Justice (Domination Inc) during the big brawl earlier.

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PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV: January 27th from The Alhambra Arena in Philadelphia, PA

PCW OVERVIEW (for the uninitiated)

Johnny Suave stands in the ring with his life-sized cardboard cut-out of Shania Twain. Crowd: “PCW!...PCW!...PCW! Suave: “Tonight, we are live from the Alhambra Arena in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania…the old ECW Arena. Only for one night only, we’re going to call it the…P-C-W Arena!” Crowd: “PCW!...PCW!...PCW!” Suave: “I am Johnny Suave, the voice of PCW. This hot piece of cardboard is the one and only Shania Twain...


...Tonight, we’re embarking on the most ambitious tour Political Championship Wrestling has ever done. We are hitting all the former ECW haunts in the East and Midwest as PCW leads up to March 8th at the Hammerstein Ballroom in New York City. That’s right, PCW’s Weapons of Mass Political Destruction pay per view will be held at the Madhouse of Extreme!” Crowd: “PCW!...PCW!...PCW!” Suave: Tonight, we’ve got-”

*“WITH TALENT ON LOAN FROM GOD!”*

The crowd immediately boos as ‘The Innovator of Extreme Broadcast Excellence’ Rush Limbaugh and the “Queen of Political Extreme” Ann Coulter appear in the spotlight and both begin to walk towards the ring. Suave: “Well, this is not a surprise. Limbaugh has been sparring publicly with the new PCW CEO Barack Obama in the news the last week. And I know Ann Coulter is never for a loss of words.” Crowd: “OX-Y CONT-TIN! (clap clap clap-clap-clap) OX-Y CONT-TIN! (clap clap clap-clap-clap)…” Limbaugh joins Suave in the ring. Rush: “That’s right. It is I…” Crowd: “WHO?” Rush: “…El Rushbo…” Crowd: “WHO?” Rush: “…The Maharushbie…” Crowd: “WHO?” Rush: “…With talent on loan from-” Crowd: “ROB!” Limbaugh pauses. Rush: “GOD!” Suave: “What can I do for you, Mr. Limbaugh?” Rush: “We’re both here tonight to say…we told you so. That’s right. It’s taken less than a week for the new PCW CEO Barack Hussein Obama to show his true colors. I don’t care what anybody else thinks. I…WANT…OBAMA…TO…FAIL. Period. I hope he fails.” More boos. Ann Coulter nods in agreement. Ann: “We don’t need socialism in PCW.” Crowd: “She’s a crack whore…(clap clap clap-clap-clap) She’s a crack whore…(clap clap clap-clap-clap) Suave: “Okay, that’s just not nice to say. Besides, it’s an insult to crack whores.” Coulter ignores the chants. Ann: “That’s what the Progressive Alliance want.” Suave: “Crack whores?” Ann: “No! Socialism. Obama wants socialism. The Progressive Alliance wants socialism.”

“Straight Shooting Maverick” John McCain comes out. John: “Rush. Ann. My friends. Look, the American Patriots can’t be obstructionist. We need to work together with CEO Obama as much as possible but still stand on principle when we need to.” Rush: “John. You’ve singlehandedly destroyed the American Patriots.” Yet more boos. Rush: “Remember both Ann and I said last year that you running for the PCW CEO for the American Patriots would destroy us. We were right. Look what’s happened to the American Patriots. Who’s left? Starz N. Stripes is gone. The Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade- they’re gone. Who’s leading the ship? Who’s in charge? No one. The American Patriots are dead in the water and it’s all YOUR fault. Had the American Patriots listened to me, El Rushbo, with talent on loan from-” Crowd: “BOB!” Rush: “GOD…you idiots. GOD! Had the AP listened to me, they wouldn’t be in this predicament right now.”

*flute and clarinet flourish*

Two men come out and unroll a white carpet to the ring steps. Dancers then dance. Ballet dancers…ballet? Little children walk up the white carpet and drop rose petals. Someone lets loose some pigeons…we’re still not sure just how they’ll get out of the building. The crowd stands and lets out a loud ovation as PCW CEO Barack Obama appears with his Aide de Camp Joe Biden by his side. Obama goes to the ring to join the conversation. Barack: “Rush, I just have two words for you……I won.” The crowd stands and cheers. Rush is not amused. Barack: “The American Patriots have a choice to make. Will they follow Rush Limbaugh, travel down the road into irrelevance, and we’ll never get anything done? Or will they follow the lead of John McCain?” Rush: “What? Is this the great unifier? The one who’s going to unify everyone and usher in a new era of bipartisanship and love? What’s clear here, Mr. Obama, is that YOU are afraid of ME. You are clearly more frightened of me, El Rushbo, with talent on loan from-” Crowd: “MOM!” Rush: “SHUT UP! IT’S GOD YOU IDIOTS…GOD, GOD, GOD! *clears throat* Now, as I was saying in a manner that only I, with my years of broadcast excellence, can say, you are more frightened of me then you are of Mitch McConnell and John Boehner- and they sit on the PCW Competition Committee.” Obama smiles. Barack: “All right, Rush. Tell you what. You bring your best wrestler to the ring. I’ll bring the PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama to the ring. And we’ll settle this there. You tell me by the end of the night who you want in the ring and we’ll do this next week on PCW Extreme Political TV.”

Suave: “THERE IT IS! NEXT WEEK, PCW CHAMPION O’BECK BAHAMA WILL DEFEND HIS TITLE AGAINST AN OPPONENT OF RUSH LIMBAUGH’S CHOOSING! WHO WILL IT BE?”

PCW NEWSLINE
Rahm Emanuel Named Leader of the Progressive Alliance
Tim Kaine, Executive Director of the Progressive Alliance, announced that Rahm Emanuel aka…Rahmbo will become the new leader of the Progressive Alliance group. Emanuel will be responsible for all wrestling activities and will report directly to Kaine.

REPLAY: PCW CEO Barack Obama’s Swearing In Last Week at PCW Night of Champions
PCW Owner Bubba Jackson and PCW Director of Security Dawn McGill climb into the ring. Bubba prepares to administer the oath. Bubba: “All right…all right.” He tries to get the crowd to quiet down. Bubba: “Barack, are you ready?” Barack: “Yes.” Bubba: “Okay. Do you swear that you’ll…do the best possible job possible to…help PCW prosper…and get…” Barack: “Big?” Bubba: “Yeah. Big.” Barack: “Yes.” Bubba: “Congratulations Mr. CEO.” The crowd stands and cheers. Suave: “And that’s it? Barack Obama is now the PCW CEO…and maybe Bubba ought to write something out ahead of time before trying to administer the oath- such as it was.”

PCW CEO OBAMA GIVEN OATH OF OFFICE A SECOND TIME BY PCW OWNER BUBBA JACKSON…JUST IN CASE
This time, Bubba wrote them down ahead of time. Big difference.

MATCH #1:
DAVE THE MECHANIC w/Tequila Sheila (Joe SixPacks) vs.
SNOTT FLEMMSTEIN (Independent)
Suave: “Last week, Dave the Mechanic lost a very close match with PCW Television Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido with a little help from the new Leader of the Progressive Alliance Rahm Emanuel. This week, he gets Snott Flemmstein.” The bell rings. Dave the Mechanic starts fast. Arm wringer followed by Irish Whip into the ropes to a Back Body Drop. Snott off the ropes for a high crossbody block. Dave catches him in mid-air and slams him to the canvas. Snott goes to his oversized prosthetic nose and shoots out green ‘snot.’ Dave ducks and then tackles Flemmstein. Dave whips him into the ropes again. Flying clothesline. Flemmstein shoots out brown boogers from his nose. Dave again ducks and dives. Single leg takedown. Slingshot into the ropes. Flemmstein catches a neck full of ring rope and shoots backwards to the canvas. Tequila Sheila throws him her trusty blender. Snott staggers up. *WHAP* Snott goes right back down. Dave covers. 1…2…3.

WINNER: DAVE THE MECHANIC

Suave: “An impressive victory for Dave the Mechanic as he- *eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee* Suave: “Oh no. That sound could only mean one person.” Dr. Bill drives up in his motorized wheelchair. One of his ankle casts has been removed but his other ankle and both arms are still in casts. Dr. Bill: “Dave, in life we teach people how to treat us. For too many years, the so-called jobbers, the cannon fodders on the PCW roster have been treated as the lowest of the low on the totem pole. Sometimes, you’ve just gotta give yourself what you wish you were getting from someone else. In this case, they need to give themselves respect. And they’re going to get it by kicking your ass in the ring right now.”

Flemmstein shoots out a green stream of snot that encases Dave the Mechanic. Jimmy from So Cal, Ivan Rectum-Fighting Proctologist, Pirate Dave, and Tanya Hardy and the White Trash Posse pounce. The White Trash Posse clip Tequila Sheila’s knee with a baton. Suave: “What in the world is going on here?”

Kevin Scott, Average Joe, American Trucker, and PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl Tessa Martin arrive. The jobbers quickly exit stage left behind their new leader Dr. Bill.

SCHETT BROTHERS PROMO
Suave: “Jack Schett, Bull Schett, Horst Schett, and the Extreme German Schnauzer Hans Gruber don’t look very happy. And with good reason. Let’s go back to last week…”

REPLAY: PCW Tag Team Title Match from last week’s PCW Night of Champions:
BIG OIL w/Texas Tex and KIRK WALSTREIT- Wall Street Market Analyst with Man Crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit © (Domination Inc.) vs.
JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT w/Horst Schett and Hans Gruber- the Extreme German Schnauzer (Progressive Alliance)
The bell rings. Big Oil takes one step forward and then climbs out of the ring. Big Oil, Walstreit, and the rest of Domination Inc walk back to the locker room. Again, the crowd craps all over it. Jack Schett stands in the ring with his arms outstretched. The referee starts to count Big Oil and Walstreit out. Suave: “They’re going back to the locker room. And of course, the title won’t change hands unless it’s a pin or submission so Big Oil and Walstreit will keep the belts. And PCW can’t say they no-showed because they were here. But the crowd is not happy.”

Jack: “Big Oil. Walstreit. You can run but at some point, you will have to face us in the ring. If you don’t think for one second that we will hunt you down and get back what is rightfully ours- the PCW Tag Team titles- then you don’t know Jack Schett. Bull: “That’s right! The way we lost the titles was a bunch of Bull Schett. I can guarantee you that with our new leader, Rahmbo Emanuel, in charge that the Bull Schett that happened at PCW Extreme Election Night will never happen again. Big Oil and Walstreit- start counting down the days because we will be the PCW Tag Team champions again. And that’s no Bull Schett.”

Suave: “Okay. The Schett Brothers want the PCW Tag Team Title back. The question is when they will get a crack at it. Big Oil is out for two more weeks after taking PCW Security Director Dawn McGill’s 4 inch stiletto heel in the balls.

MATCH #2:
AVERAGE JOE (Joe SixPacks) vs.
QUADRUPLE R (Domination Inc.)
Suave: “I don’t see any of the others from Domination Inc. Quadruple R has got a ton of talent but he can’t always control his emotions. He wants a shot at the PCW Title. Let’s see what he can do tonight.” Quad R starts quickly with a gutwrench suplex and locks in a half nelson crossface. Quad R hits a high knee and bulldogs Average Joe to the canvas. He drags him up and tosses him out of the ring. Quad R finds a chair. *CLANG* He drags Average Joe back into the ring holding the chair. Suave: “Quadruple R setting him up…DDT ON THE CHAIR! THAT’LL DO IT. ONE. TWO. THAT’S IT.”

WINNER: QUADRUPLE R

Suave: “An impressive victory for Quadruple R and NO INTERFERENCE FROM DOMINATION INC! After everything that happened last week, that’s a bit of a surprise.”

PCW NEWSLINE
Emergency Domination Inc. Board Meeting
PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein reports that Domination Inc. did indeed hold an emergency board meeting over the weekend. Topic #1 was dealing with the new PCW Security Director Dawn McGill. While breaking up a huge brawl, between the Joe SixPacks and Domination Inc., McGill kicked one half of the PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil in the balls with her 4” stilettos for the second time in a month.

After PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins had just pinned challenger ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin after Quadruple R smacked Tessa over the head with a chair, all hell broke loose…

REPLAY: Aftermath of KRC/’PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl Match from 1/20-PCW NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS
Suave: “THIS SUCKS! THIS IS SUCH A BULL CRAP ENDING! NO FREAKIN’ WAY…HOLD ON!” Joe SixPack hits the ring. Kevin Scott tackles Quad R and they start to brawl. ‘The Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade join in and triple team Quad R. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! REDNECK 4-D DEATH BLAST ON QUADRUPLE R! AND HERE COMES DOMINATION INC.!” Rough Justice…aka D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice- two former police officers fired for their over the top extreme style of justice, wade in with Daisy Cutter-Bomb, Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit. Ruff and Justice taser the hell out of Locke and Loade- they’re out. Big Oil and Walstreit lock up get into a wild brawl with Average Joe and the American Trucker- an old grudge match from a few months back. Joe the Plumber tries to help out but Daisy Cutter-Bomb kicks him in the balls. Suave: “Ah…poor Joe. DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB! DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB!” Daisy leaves Joe in a heap. Ruff and Justice duel with Kevin Scott. Justice gets the taser on Scott and takes him down. Suave: “HERE COMES DAVE THE MECHANIC!” Dave, still a bit winded from his TV Title match, wheels his battery charger down with him. He grabs the jumper cables and *ZZZZZAP* down goes Ruff. Justice lunges at him *ZZZZZAP* down goes Justice. Walstreit Stock Market Plunges American Trucker. Big Oil choke slams Average Joe. Suave: “HE’S GOT HIM! *WHAM* OKLAHOMA DRILLER! OKLAHOMA DRILLER!...” The crowd suddenly cheers. Suave: “HERE COMES PCW SECURITY DIRECTOR DAWN McGILL!”

McGill, with Singapore Cane in hand, runs up to Walstreit. *THWACK* *THWACK* Walstreit staggers into the steel guardrail. Big Oil rips the jumper cables away from Dave the Mechanic and choke slams him. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! Dave bounced up about six inches off the canvas!” Big Oil goes for the jumper cables, McGill plants her 4 inch stiletto heels in his groin. Big Oil to his knees. *THWACK* Big Oil topples over. Daisy Cutter-Bomb attacks McGill from behind and knocks the Singapore cane away. McGill instinctively whirls around with an open hand and smacks Daisy in the face. She stumbles all the way across the ring. McGill picks up the Singapore cane but gets blindsided by the PCW Women’s champion Kathryn Randall Collins. KRC drives McGill to the corner. McGill kick to the groin with her stilettos stops KRC in her tracks. She takes two steps back and turns around to see ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin standing there- with her oversized pizza box. *WHAP* Suave: “HELLO! and GOODNIGHT! TESSA COVERS KRC! SHE COUNTS OUT HER OWN PINFALL.” An angry Tessa yells at KRC. Then she takes the pizza box and Arabian Facebusters KRC for good measure.

Big Oil is now out for the next three weeks to heal. Topic #2 was a discussion about the PCW Competition Committee changing the rules before last week’s Night of Champions.

REPLAY: PCW Competition Committee Announcement Concerning Title Defenses from PCW Night of Champions
Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, and Steny Hoyer of the Progressive Alliance are joined by American Patriots’ John Boehner and Mitch McConnell. Pelosi: “Last week, Domination Inc. announced that they found a loophole in the PCW competition rules that allowed their wrestlers, PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit, PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins, not to put their title belts up in matches tonight. After a long consultation between all five members of the PCW Competition Committee, PCW CEO George W, and PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama, we have come up with a solution.” Pelosi produces a sheet of paper and reads from it. Pelosi: “We, the PCW Competition Committee, by unanimous vote, hereby change the PCW Rules and By-Laws as follows: ‘Each champion must put their title up in competition at Pay Per View shows, PCW Night of Champions, and otherwise, at least once a month. Therefore, the PCW Competition Committee decrees that tonight’s matches between Jack and Bull Schett vs. Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit WILL be for the PCW Tag Team belts. Tonight’s match between ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and Kathryn Randall Collins will be for the PCW Women’s title.”

Bernstein did not gleam any specifics from the meeting. But it appears Domination Inc. is itching for a fight.

‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews and Newsweek’s Jonathan Alter Attack Sarah Palin at PCW House Show
Just when it appeared that the Sarah Palin/Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, Paul Krugman conflict was dying down, ‘Hardball’ Matthews and Jonathan Alter launched a sneak attack on the Alaskan Pitbull Saturday night at a PCW House Show in Bowling Green, Ohio.

REPLAY: KALEE JONES w/ ‘Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (American Patriots) vs. EMILY LIST w/ Arianna Huffington (Progressive Alliance) from PCW House Show in Bowling Green, Ohio.
Jones hits a press slam on List. Big leg drop. Jones lifts her up for the Eskimo Pieface. WHAM! She covers. 1…2…3. Bell rings. ‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews and Jonathan Alter run up and attack Palin from behind. Matthews and Alter try to drag Palin to the back. Politically Incorrect (NRA, Al Cahall, Nic Koteen, and Hunter the Hunter) w/the Queen of Political Incorrectness Andrea Doria. Jones goes after Matthews and Alter from the front. She leaps and clotheslines Alter to the floor. Cahall, Koteen, and NRA gang up on ‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews. Jones lifts Alter up…ESKIMO PIEFACE on the floor! Alter rolls over and his face is a mess. Cahall and Koteen whip Hardball to the ring post. Hunter the Hunter then sets up his finisher…the bear trap. NRA pushes him towards Hunter. *SNAP* BEAR TRAP! Matthews screams and tries to pry the steel trap off his foot.

MATCH #3:
KALEE JONES- The Eskimo Queen w/Elisabeth Hasselbeck from ‘The View’ (American Patriots) vs.
CODE PINK w/Joy Behar from ‘The View’ (Progressive Alliance)
Suave: “Code Pink is still hobbled a bit from her injury last week on PCW Night of Champions when she accidently drop kicked a steel guardrail and severely sprained her ankle. The ankle is heavily wrapped. Kalee Jones just looks ready to kill someone.” Hasselbeck and Behar spar with each other from across the ring. Bell rings. Jones scoop slams Code Pink right out of the box. Jones works Code Pink’s bad ankle. Then she drags Code Pink up by the hair. Suave: “There she goes. *WHAM* ESKIMO PIEFACE! ESKIMO PIEFACE!” Jones doesn’t bother to cover. She sticks her boot on Code Pink. 1…2…3.

WINNER: KALEE JONES- The Eskimo Queen

Suave: “I don’t think Code Pink should have even been in the ring with her. Clearly, she’s injured. Hasselbeck and Behar get into it. Behar shoves Hasselbeck. Hasselbeck shoves Behar. THERE THEY GO! CAT-FIIIIIIIIIGHT! CAT-FIIIIIIIIIIGHT!” Hasselbeck and Behar roll around the ring. Suave: “HERE COMES THE ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS!” Professor Paul Krugman leads Daily Kos, Eric Alterman, Media Matters for America, and News Hounds out and they attack Hasselbeck. Suave: “AND HERE COMES POLITICALLY INCORRECT!” ‘The Queen of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria charges out in her fur coat, bikini top and bottom, her heeled shoes, cigarette, and holding a bottle of Jack Daniels, with Nic Koteen, Al Cahall, and Hunter the Hunter. The referee tries to separate the two groups. He gives up and grabs a microphone. Referee: “Screw it. You guys want to kill each other. Then go ahead. RING THE BELL!”

MATCH #4:
POLITICALLY INCORRECT- Al Cahall, Nic Koteen, NRA, and Hunter the Hunter w/ ‘The Queen of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria vs.
THE ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS- Daily Kos, Eric Alterman, Media Matters for America, and News Hounds w/Professor Paul Krugman
Hasselbeck and Behar brawl to the back. All eight men in the ring. Complete chaos. They just start punching each other! Al Cahall slams Daily Kos to the floor. Andrea Doria sets up two chairs. Cahall hits a side slam on the two set up chairs. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! Nic Koteen gets a chair wrapped round his neck by Eric Alterman. He fights back with strikes. Chair shot for the Koteen! A THIRD CHAIR SHOT!” Alterman covers…no! Hunter the Hunter yanks him off. NRA SENTONS ALTERMAN ONTO THE CHAIR!" Crowd: “HOLY S***!...HOLY S***!” News Hounds and NRA go at it. News Hounds with a pair of vicious chair shots. NRA bleeds from the head. Cahall and Daily Kos take it into the bleachers and get in a few more shots in on each other. Cahall gets a back mount and wails away with punches. Daily Kos flips him over his head and Cahall lands hard on the floor. Daily Kos gets a couple of chair shots in.

NRA laid out on a table. Alterman sentons…and hits it! Crowd: “PCW!...PCW!...PCW! Suave: “This has just been brutal. Alterman sentons NRA through the freakin’ table. Another table is set up in the ring. Koteen and Cahall brawl with Media Matters and News Hounds. Cahall throws News Hounds on the table. But News Hounds hangs onto Cahall and pulls him on as well. The table can’t take the weight of them and it collapses. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! They both landed badly.” Media Matters grabs a chunk of table and breaks it over Nic Koteen’s back. Back into the ring. Suave: “ALTERMAN THROWS A CHAIR AT HUNTER THE HUNTER!” Hunter goes to walk away and but Alterman picks the chair up again. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! HE THREWS THAT AT THE BACK OF HUNTER THE HUNTER’S HEAD!” Hunter staggers. Alterman goes for powerbomb through yet another table. Hunter somehow reverses it. Suave: “PILEDRIVER! PILEDRIVER THROUGH THE FREAKIN’ TABLE! HOLY, HOLY CRAP!” Crowd: “HOLY S***!...HOLY S***!” Hunter covers but News Hounds dives in for the save.

Outside in the back, right below Suave’s broadcast position. Al Cahall has Daily Kos draped over a table and he has climbed up to where Suave is. Suave: “WHAT IN THE HELL IS HE DOING? HE’S GOING TO PUT KOS THROUGH THE TABLE FROM TWENTY FEET UP!” Cahall looks really tired. He’s ready to jump. Suave: “IT’S THE GREEN WORLD ORDER!” ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee runs over and pushes Cahall over the edge. Below, GreenPete pulls Daily Kos off the table. *CRUNCH* Suave: “HOLY CRAP! CAHALL JUST DESTROYED THAT TABLE!” Crowd: “THIS MATCH ROCKS! THIS MATCH ROCKS!” GreenPete to the ring. Suave: “PETA FROM PETA IS TRYING TO CHOKE OUT ANDREA DORIA!” Peta, furious at Doria for wearing fur, has a choke hold on her. Doria flips her over her head and Peta from PETA lands on the floor. PeaceNick comes in from behind and slaps a handkerchief full of chloroform on her. Suave: “CHLOROFORM! CHLOROFORM!” Andrea fades out and falls to the floor. Peta from PETA strips her of the fur coat and lays it down. She soaks it in lighter fluid and sets it on fire.

*SNAP* Paul Krugman: “AAARGHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Suave: “WHAT THE- BEAR TRAP! BEAR TRAP! KRUGMAN’S LOCKED INTO HUNTER THE HUNTER’S BEAR TRAP!” Media Matters and News Hounds go over and desperately try to pry the trap open. Suave: “OH, OH. THEY DON’T SEE HUNTER THE HUNTER!” Chairshot to Media Matters. Chairshot to News Hounds. Chairshot to GreenPete. In the ring, NRA has Brock Cole Lee in the Gun Rack. Peta from PETA hops in the ring and low blows NRA. Hunter the Hunter now in the ring. He grabs Peta by the hair and body slams her. Daily Kos is back in the ring and HE low blows Hunter the Hunter. Bulldog. Cover. 1…2… Suave: “NO! Hunter kicks out. WAIT A MINUTE! NRA HAS A SHOTGUN!” NRA: “YOU’LL HAVE TO PRY THIS FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS” *WHAP* Suave: “HOLY CRAP! HE JUST BLASTED DAILY KOS WITH THE BUTT OF THE SHOTGUN! NRA COVERS. ONE…TWO…THREE!”

WINNER: POLITICALLY INCORRECT- Al Cahall, Nic Koteen, NRA, and Hunter the Hunter

Suave: “They’re still trying to get Krugman out of the Bear Trap. There’s bodies littered all over the hall. Wow!-”

*“WITH TALENT ON LOAN FROM GOD!”*

LIMBAUGH ANNOUNCES HIS CHOICE
‘The Innovator of Extreme Broadcast Excellence’ Rush Limbaugh comes out. He walks around the assorted bodies in and around the ring. Suave: “Well? I guess it’s time to find out who’ll represent Rush Limbaugh next week against the PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama.” Rush: “Yes, it is I, again...” Crowd: “WHO?” Rush: “…El Rushbo…” Crowd: “WHO?” Rush: “…The Maharushbie…” Crowd: “WHO?” Rush: “With talent on loan from-” Crowd: “TODD!” Rush: “…GOD!...At this time, I’d like to introduce my choice to represent me, Rush Limbaugh, next week against PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama.”

*‘Domination Inc. will completely takeover Political Championship Wrestling by any and all means*

Suave: “Okay. I’m not sure if this is good or bad.” Limbaugh watches as the members of Domination Inc file into the arena. Rush: “Quadruple R!” The crowd erupts into boos. Quadruple R steps forwards and raises his hands. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! Has Rush Limbaugh allied himself with Domination Inc.? What does that mean for the American Patriots? Next week, Quadruple R finally gets his title shot against the PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama. I’m Johnny Suave- see you next week.”

-------
LINKS:
Buckland County Gazette

Political Championship Wrestling at Blogspot

Political Championship Wrestling at Wordpress

American Heartland Bar and Grill

Prairie Depot Press at Blogspot

Screw the BCS at Blogspot

Exploding Sheep Productions

Monday, January 26, 2009

1/26- PCW Newsline: Domination Inc. Board Meeting, 'Hardball' Chris Matthews and Jonathan Alter Attack Sarah Palin

1/26- PCW NEWSLINE

EMERGENCY DOMINATION INC. BOARD MEETING
PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein reports that Domination Inc. did indeed hold an emergency board meeting over the weekend. Topic #1 was dealing with the new PCW Security Director Dawn McGill. While breaking up a huge brawl, between the Joe SixPacks and Domination Inc., McGill kicked one half of the PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil in the balls with her 4” stilettos for the second time in a month.

After PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins had just pinned challenger ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin after Quadruple R smacked Tessa over the head with a chair, all hell broke loose…

REPLAY: Aftermath of KRC/’PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl Match from 1/20-PCW NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS
Suave:
“THIS SUCKS! THIS IS SUCH A BULL CRAP ENDING! NO FREAKIN’ WAY…HOLD ON!” Joe SixPack hits the ring. Kevin Scott tackles Quad R and they start to brawl. ‘The Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade join in and triple team Quad R. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! REDNECK 4-D DEATH BLAST ON QUADRUPLE R! AND HERE COMES DOMINATION INC.!” Rough Justice…aka D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice- two former police officers fired for their over the top extreme style of justice, wade in with Daisy Cutter-Bomb, Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit. Ruff and Justice taser the hell out of Locke and Loade- they’re out. Big Oil and Walstreit lock up get into a wild brawl with Average Joe and the American Trucker- an old grudge match from a few months back. Joe the Plumber tries to help out but Daisy Cutter-Bomb kicks him in the balls. Suave: “Ah…poor Joe. DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB! DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB!” Daisy leaves Joe in a heap. Ruff and Justice duel with Kevin Scott. Justice gets the taser on Scott and takes him down. Suave: “HERE COMES DAVE THE MECHANIC!” Dave, still a bit winded from his TV Title match, wheels his battery charger down with him. He grabs the jumper cables and *ZZZZZAP* down goes Ruff. Justice lunges at him *ZZZZZAP* down goes Justice. Walstreit Stock Market Plunges American Trucker. Big Oil choke slams Average Joe. Suave: “HE’S GOT HIM! *WHAM* OKLAHOMA DRILLER! OKLAHOMA DRILLER!...” The crowd suddenly cheers. Suave: “HERE COMES PCW SECURITY DIRECTOR DAWN McGILL!”
McGill, with Singapore Cane in hand, runs up to Walstreit. *THWACK* *THWACK* Walstreit staggers into the steel guardrail. Big Oil rips the jumper cables away from Dave the Mechanic and choke slams him. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! Dave bounced up about six inches off the canvas!” Big Oil goes for the jumper cables, McGill plants her 4 inch stiletto heels in his groin. Big Oil to his knees. *THWACK* Big Oil topples over. Daisy Cutter-Bomb attacks McGill from behind and knocks the Singapore cane away. McGill instinctively whirls around with an open hand and smacks Daisy in the face. She stumbles all the way across the ring. McGill picks up the Singapore cane but gets blindsided by the PCW Women’s champion Kathryn Randall Collins. KRC drives McGill to the corner. McGill kick to the groin with her stilettos stops KRC in her tracks. She takes two steps back and turns around to see ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin standing there- with her oversized pizza box. *WHAP* Suave: “HELLO! and GOODNIGHT! TESSA COVERS KRC! SHE COUNTS OUT HER OWN PINFALL.” An angry Tessa yells at KRC. Then she takes the pizza box and Arabian Facebusters KRC for good measure.

Big Oil is now out for the next three weeks to heal. Topic #2 was a discussion about the PCW Competition Committee changing the rules before last week’s Night of Champions.

REPLAY: PCW Competition Committee Announcement Concerning Title Defenses from PCW Night of Champions
Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, and Steny Hoyer of the Progressive Alliance are joined by American Patriots’ John Boehner and Mitch McConnell. Pelosi: “Last week, Domination Inc. announced that they found a loophole in the PCW competition rules that allowed their wrestlers, PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit, PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins, not to put their title belts up in matches tonight. After a long consultation between all five members of the PCW Competition Committee, PCW CEO George W, and PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama, we have come up with a solution.” Pelosi produces a sheet of paper and reads from it. Pelosi: “We, the PCW Competition Committee, by unanimous vote, hereby change the PCW Rules and By-Laws as follows: ‘Each champion must put their title up in competition at Pay Per View shows, PCW Night of Champions, and otherwise, at least once a month. Therefore, the PCW Competition Committee decrees that tonight’s matches between Jack and Bull Schett vs. Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit WILL be for the PCW Tag Team belts. Tonight’s match between ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and Kathryn Randall Collins will be for the PCW Women’s title.”

Bernstein did not gleam any specifics from the meeting. But tomorrow night’s PCW Extreme Political TV could be very interesting as it appears Domination Inc. is itching for a fight. We may see very early on in the evening just what their intentions are.

‘HARDBALL’ CHRIS MATTHEWS AND NEWSWEEK’S JONATHAN ALTER ATTACK SARAH PALIN AT A PCW HOUSE SHOW
Just when it appeared that the Sarah Palin/Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, Paul Krugman conflict was dying down, ‘Hardball’ Matthews and Jonathan Alter launched a sneak attack on the Alaskan Pitbull Saturday night at a PCW House Show in Bowling Green, Ohio.

REPLAY: KALEE JONES w/ ‘Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (American Patriots) vs. EMILY LIST w/ Arianna Huffington (Progressive Alliance) from PCW House Show in Bowling Green, Ohio.
…Jones hits a press slam on List. Big leg drop. Jones lifts her up for the Eskimo Pieface. WHAM! She covers. 1…2…3. Bell rings. ‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews and Jonathan Alter run up and attack Palin from behind. Matthews and Alter try to drag Palin to the back. Politically Incorrect (NRA, Al Cahall, Nic Koteen, and Hunter the Hunter) w/the Queen of Political Incorrectness Andrea Doria. Jones goes after Matthews and Alter from the front. She leaps and clotheslines Alter to the floor. Cahall, Koteen, and NRA gang up on ‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews. Jones lifts Alter up…ESKIMO PIEFACE on the floor! Alter rolls over and his face is a mess. Cahall and Koteen whip Hardball to the ring post. Hunter the Hunter then sets up his finisher…the bear trap. NRA pushes him towards Hunter. *SNAP* BEAR TRAP! Matthews screams and tries to pry the steel trap off his foot.

PREVIEW OF 1/27 PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV
-Snott Flemmstein vs. Dave the Mechanic (Joe SixPacks)
-Average Joe (Joe SixPacks) vs. Quadruple R (Progressive Alliance)
-Kalee Jones w/Elisabeth Hasselbeck (American Patriots) vs. Code Pink w/Joy Behar (Progressive Alliance)
-Politically Incorrect (NRA, Nic Koteen, Al Cahall, and Hunter the Hunter) w/The Queen of Political Incorrectness vs. The Angry Left Wing Bloggers (Daily Kos, Eric Alterman, Media Matters for American, and News Hounds) w/Professor Paul Krugman in 8 man tag team action.


UPCOMING SCHEDULE OF EVENTS:
1/27- PCW Extreme Political TV
1/29- PCW Newsline
2/2- PCW Newsline
2/3- PCW Extreme Political TV
2/6- PCW Newsline
2/9- PCW Newsline
2/10- PCW Extreme Political TV

PREVIOUS SHOWS AND NEWSLINES:
1/22- PCW Newsline: PCW Night of Champions Results, Obama Takes Oath of Office Again, Rahm Emanuel Named Progressive Alliance Wrestling Leader
1/20- PCW Night of Champions- Hour 2: Rahm Emanuel aka…Rahmbo Debuts, O’Beck Bahama Retains PCW Title, George W. Leaves For the Final Time
1/20- PCW Night of Champions- Hour 1: Barack Obama Assumes PCW CEO Post, Sarah Palin and the Eskimo Queen vs. Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Paul Krugman, Domination Inc. Gives is Given Ultimatum
1/19- PCW Newsline: Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman Attack Sarah Palin Yet Again, Politically Incorrect Returns, PCW Night of Champions Preview
1/17- Sarah Palin Models the New PCW Jersey
1/15- PCW Newsline: Recap of PCW Extreme Political TV, PCW Competition Committee to Close Loophole Found by Domination Inc., Looking Back at George W’s Reign Over PCW
1/13- PCW Extreme Political TV: Keith Olbermann and Arianna Huffington Vow to Destroy Sarah Palin, Code Pink Debuts, American Patriots Leadership Candidates Meet with What’s Left of the American Patriots
1/12- PCW Newsline: Keith Olbermann and Professor Paul Krugman Attack Sarah Palin Again at PCW House Show, Domination Inc. Board Meeting, Preview of 1/13- PCW Extreme Political TV
1/8- PCW Newsline: PCW Owners Bubba Jackson and DeWayne Cantrell, Keith Olbermann Attacks Sarah Palin at PCW House Show

----------------------------------------
LINKS:
Buckland County Gazette

Political Championship Wrestling at Blogspot

Political Championship Wrestling at Wordpress

American Heartland Bar and Grill

Prairie Depot Press at Blogspot

Screw the BCS at Blogspot

Exploding Sheep Productions

Thursday, January 22, 2009

1/22- PCW NEWSLINE

PCW NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS RESULTS- 1/20/09
-The PCW Competition Committee updated the PCW rules to close a loophole found by Domination Inc’s Corporate Attorneys Felcher and Felcher. The Committee ruled that PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins (Domination Inc) and PCW Tag Team Champs Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (Domination Inc) had to put their title on the line tonight.

-Another look at the new PCW Jersey as modeled by Sarah Palin

-PCW Owner Bubba Jackson stumbled a bit but managed to give Barack Obama the oath and he becomes the new PCW CEO.

-Domination Inc comes out and demands that Obama veto the PCW Competition Committee’s plan to close the loophole. Obama refuses. Domination Inc threatens to walk out. Obama tells them to leave their belts because a no-show automatically forfeits the title.

-Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen and Alaskan Pitbull Sarah Palin (American Patriots) wrestle to no-decision with Code Pink and Emily List (Progressive Alliance) when Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman and the Angry Left Wing Bloggers interfere causing the ‘Queen of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria and Politically Incorrect to come out to even the odds.

-Domination Inc meet in their suite. Quadruple R goes crazy and wants to kick some butt. Mr. McMann turns him loose to do so.

-PCW Television Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance) defeats Dave the Mechanic (Joe SixPacks) when Rahm Emanuel aka…Rahmbo debuts and helps Escondido get the ankle lock on Dave.

-PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins aka…KRC (Domination Inc) pinned ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Joe SixPacks) when Quadruple R hit Tessa with a steel folding chair from behind. A huge brawl broke out between Domination Inc and Joe SixPacks and PCW Security Director Dawn McGill came out and cleaned house. She nailed Big Oil in the groin with her 4 inch stilettos and takes out most of Domination Inc with her Singapore cane. Mr. McMann is not pleased.

-PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit retained their title after losing by count out to Jack Schett and Bull Schett. When the bell rung, Big Oil and Walstreit simply walked out with the rest of Domination Inc.

-Former PCW CEO George W is jeered by Obama fans as he leaves Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon for the final time.

-PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama (Progressive Alliance) pinned a weakened Kevin Scott (Joe SixPacks). Scott had been tasered by Rough Justice (Domination Inc) during the big brawl earlier.

PCW CEO OBAMA GIVEN OATH OF OFFICE A SECOND TIME BY PCW OWNER BUBBA JACKSON…JUST IN CASE
This time, Bubba wrote them down ahead of time. Big difference.

NOTES FROM TUESDAY NIGHT:
-The show nearly didn’t start on time because Rick Warren’s invocation lasted nearly a half an hour.
-PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein confirmed that SNAFU suffered a concussion at the hands of Dave the Mechanic at the 1/13 PCW Extreme Political TV event. SNAFU should be back within the next two weeks. A side note- the cast should come off of one of Dr. Bill’s ankles later this week.
-Rahm Emanuel made his official debut in PCW with the run-in that helped ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido retain the PCW Television title. More on Rahm in just a moment.
-Domination Inc. will be holding a special board meeting over the weekend after Tuesday night’s fiasco. ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann is reportedly furious at PCW Security Director Dawn McGill nailing Big Oil in the balls with her 4 inch stilettos for the second time in two weeks. McMann is also still very upset at the PCW Competition Committee and PCW CEO Barack Obama for ‘changing the rules mid-stream’ by making the PCW Tag Team and Women’s Champions put their titles on the line. There could be some big trouble brewing on the horizon.

RAHM EMANUEL NAMED LEADER OF THE PROGRESSIVE ALLIANCE
Tim Kaine, Executive Director of the Progressive Alliance, announced that Rahm Emanuel aka…Rahmbo will become the new leader of the Progressive Alliance group. Emanuel will be responsible for all wrestling activities and will report directly to Kaine.

DR. BILL


AND NEWCOMER, ‘THE QUEEN OF POLITICAL INCORRECTNESS’ ANDREA DORIA



UPCOMING SCHEDULE OF EVENTS:
1/26- PCW Newsline
1/27- PCW Extreme Political TV
1/29- PCW Newsline
2/2- PCW Newsline
2/3- PCW Extreme Political TV
2/6- PCW Newsline
2/9- PCW Newsline
2/10- PCW Extreme Political TV

PREVIOUS SHOWS AND NEWSLINES:

1/20- PCW Night of Champions- Hour 2: Rahm Emanuel aka…Rahmbo Debuts, O’Beck Bahama Retains PCW Title, George W. Leaves For the Final Time
1/20- PCW Night of Champions- Hour 1: Barack Obama Assumes PCW CEO Post, Sarah Palin and the Eskimo Queen vs. Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Paul Krugman, Domination Inc. Gives is Given Ultimatum
1/19- PCW Newsline: Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman Attack Sarah Palin Yet Again, Politically Incorrect Returns, PCW Night of Champions Preview
1/17- Sarah Palin Models the New PCW Jersey
1/15- PCW Newsline: Recap of PCW Extreme Political TV, PCW Competition Committee to Close Loophole Found by Domination Inc., Looking Back at George W’s Reign Over PCW
1/13- PCW Extreme Political TV: Keith Olbermann and Arianna Huffington Vow to Destroy Sarah Palin, Code Pink Debuts, American Patriots Leadership Candidates Meet with What’s Left of the American Patriots
1/12- PCW Newsline: Keith Olbermann and Professor Paul Krugman Attack Sarah Palin Again at PCW House Show, Domination Inc. Board Meeting, Preview of 1/13- PCW Extreme Political TV
1/8- PCW Newsline: PCW Owners Bubba Jackson and DeWayne Cantrell, Keith Olbermann Attacks Sarah Palin at PCW House Show

----------------------------------------
LINKS:
Buckland County.com

Political Championship Wrestling at Blogspot

Political Championship Wrestling at Wordpress

American Heartland Bar and Grill

Prairie Depot Press at Blogspot

Screw the BCS at Blogspot

Exploding Sheep Productions

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

1/20-PCW Night of Champions- Hour 2: Rahm Emanuel aka Rahmbo debuts, O'Beck Bahama Retains PCW Title, 3 Other Title Matches

Hour 2

DOMINATION INC. SUITE
‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann paces back and forth in his office. The door busts open and Quadruple R bursts in. Quad R: “This is total and complete bull****! We don’t have to take this from them. I’m sick and tired of getting screwed over by PCW. We can’t let this go unanswered. I want them and I want them now. Let me do it, Mr. McMann. Let me do it.” McMann hesitates. McMann: “Oh…the hell with it. Fine. When KRC’s match starts, go do whatever you’re going to do.”

Suave: “O—kay. That doesn’t augur good for the women’s title match. Let’s go back to last week's PCW Extreme Political TV as ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido was to defend the PCW Television Title against SNAFU.”

REPLAY- MATCH SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) vs.
‘No Frills’ CHRIS ESCONDIDO (Progressive Alliance)
Escondido’s already in the ring. No sign of SNAFU or Dr. Bill. Suave: “I wonder what’s going on?”

BACKSTAGE
Dave the Mechanic stands over an unconscious SNAFU. Tequila Sheila has the battery to Dr. Bill’s motorized wheelchair. Dave goes over to Dr. Bill. Dave the Mechanic: “Here’s the scoop, Doc. I will get my chance at the PCW Television Title next week at PCW Night of Champions. I will do so without any interference from you or SNAFU or else I promise you that anything you do to me I will return ten thousand times over. This is my title shot. You and SNAFU stay the hell away.”

DR. BILL PROMO
Dr. Bill: “All right. You’ve got your wish, Dave. SNAFU has a concussion and he’s still recovering which means we won’t be at PCW Night of Champions. But mark my words. You’re now on the list as well. First, we’ll deal with Escondido. Then, we’ll deal with you. But remember this- when you don't respond to what happens in the world, you don't respond to what people say to you. What you do is respond to what you say to yourself about what they say to you. It's all about you, it's not about them. Or in other words, we will respond in kind to your attack last week. It doesn’t take a nagging mother-in-law to cry a lot, Dave. And when SNAFU gets through with you, that’s exactly what you’ll be doing. Crying. With your mother-in-law. Or something like that. Now…go take on the day.”

Suave: “So. It looks like SNAFU is out. Can Dave the Mechanic capitalize on this? We’re about to find out.”

MATCH #2 PCW TELEVISION TITLE MATCH:
‘No Frills’ CHRIS ESCONDIDO © (Progressive Alliance) vs.
DAVE THE MECHANIC w/Tequila Sheila (Joe SixPacks)
The bell rings and they lock up. Quick chain wrestling sequence where both men reverse each other. The crowd claps in appreciation. Escondido puts Dave in a headlock. Dave escapes and whips Escondido off the ropes. Hip toss sends Escondido to the canvas. Dave hits a bulldog and covers. Escondido kicks out at two. Another headlock by Escondido, but again Dave gets out and whips the TV Champ into the ropes. Escondido holds on to the ropes and composes himself. Escondido comes back with a boot and goes to the ring apron. Dave charges, Escondido hits a shoulder block, and he tries to leap back in. Dave catches coming in and Escondido gets sent to the outside. Dave follows and whips Escondido into the ring post. Dave brings Escondido back into the ring and works on the left shoulder. He rams Escondido into the turnbuckle. Escondido tries fights out with a kick but Dave catches him on the second try and drills Escondido’s head right into the mat. Cover. Again, Escondido kicks out at two. Escondido starts fighting back. He blocks a shoulder block attempt and hits a boot to the face. Escondido covers…two count. Suave: “So far, Dave the Mechanic is about a step ahead of the PCW TV champ. He continues to show that he belongs in there with him.”

Escondido locks Dave in a reverse headlock. Dave fights out and catches Jack ducking too early after a whip and nails him with a boot to the face. Dave goes up top, but Escondido catches him and turns it into a superplex. Escondido crawls over and covers. Dave kicks out at two. Again, Escondido goes back to an arm wrench hammerlock and tries to wear down Dave. Dave makes the corner. But Escondido hammers at his back and lifts him up on the turnbuckle. Suave: “Superplex on the way!” Dave fights out of the superplex. Escondido ducks down and hits a powerbomb. Cover. Another two count. Dave kicks out at two! Escondido follows with a belly to belly Suplex. Another cover; another two count. Escondido notices the turnbuckle pad got ripped off. Escondido bulldogs Dave and then tries to apply the Angle Ankle Lock. Dave rolls out and counters with a side Russian Legsweep. Escondido back up and Dave shoves off a second bulldog attempt. Roll up. Escondido kicks out in 2. A third bulldog attempt doesn’t work. Escondido into the ropes. Dave rolls him up. One…two…barely kicks out. Suave: “WOW! That was a 2.999999 count. Escondido barely got out but he’s in big trou-…Hey…who’s that? That’s Rahm Emanuel…RAHM-BO!” Crowd: “RAHMMMM-BO….RAHMMMMM-BO…” Irish whip attempt by Dave. Escondido counters and sends Dave into the ropes. Emanuel grabs his legs and stops him. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! EMANUEL GRABBED DAVE AND THEN ESCONDIDO NEARLY DECAPATATES HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE!” Dave staggers forward. Bulldog by Escondido. Suave: “THERE HE GOES…ANKLE LOCK! ANKLE LOCK! ANKLE LOCK! TEQUILA SHEILA IN THE RING!” Rahmbo runs over and grabs her legs and pulls them out from under her. Suave: “THAT’S IT! DAVE TAPS OUT!”

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: ‘No Frills’ CHRIS ESCONDIDO

Suave: “CHRIS ESCONDIDO HOLDS ON TO THE PCW TELEVISION TITLE…thanks to a little help from…RAHMBO!” Crowd: “RAHMMMMM-BO!...RAHMMMMM-BO!”

UPCOMING SCHEDULE OF EVENTS:
1/22- PCW Newsline
1/26- PCW Newsline
1/27- PCW Extreme Political TV
1/29- PCW Newsline
2/2- PCW Newsline
2/3- PCW Extreme Political TV
2/6- PCW Newsline
2/9- PCW Newsline
2/10- PCW Extreme Political TV
More to come leading up to: 3/8- PCW Weapons of Mass Political Destruction 2 Pay Per View

Suave: Well? We’re going to find out really quick what intentions Domination Inc. has. ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin is already in the ring with Tequila Sheila.

MATCH #3 PCW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:
KATHRYN RANDALL COLLINS…aka KRC © (Domination Inc.) vs.
‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ TESSA MARTIN w/Tequila Sheila (Joe SixPacks)
Suave:
“Tessa’s still waiting. I don’t know what’s going- IT’S QUADRUPLE R WITH A CHAIR! *CLANG* HOLY CRAP! TESSA’S DOWN AND I DON’T THINK SHE’S GETTING UP! *CLANG* QUADRUPLE R JUST DRILLED TEQUILA SHEILA WITH THE CHAIR! AND HERE COMES KRC!” The crowd craps all over this. They are pissed. Debris starts flying into the ring. The PCW Women’s Champion turns Tessa over and sticks her foot on her chest. The referee reluctantly counts it. 1…2…3.

WINNER AND STILL PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: KATHRYN RANDALL COLLINS

Suave: “THIS SUCKS! THIS IS SUCH A BULL CRAP ENDING! NO FREAKIN’ WAY…HOLD ON!” Joe SixPack hits the ring. Kevin Scott tackles Quad R and they start to brawl. ‘The Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade join in and triple team Quad R. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! REDNECK 4-D DEATH BLAST ON QUADRUPLE R! AND HERE COMES DOMINATION INC.!” Rough Justice…aka D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice- two former police officers fired for their over the top extreme style of justice, wade in with Daisy Cutter-Bomb, Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit. Ruff and Justice taser the hell out of Locke and Loade- they’re out. Big Oil and Walstreit lock up get into a wild brawl with Average Joe and the American Trucker- an old grudge match from a few months back. Joe the Plumber tries to help out but Daisy Cutter-Bomb kicks him in the balls. Suave: “Ah…poor Joe. DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB! DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB!” Daisy leaves Joe in a heap. Ruff and Justice duel with Kevin Scott. Justice gets the taser on Scott and takes him down. Suave: “HERE COMES DAVE THE MECHANIC!” Dave, still a bit winded from his TV Title match, wheels his battery charger down with him. He grabs the jumper cables and *ZZZZZAP* down goes Ruff. Justice lunges at him *ZZZZZAP* down goes Justice. Walstreit Stock Market Plunges American Trucker. Big Oil choke slams Average Joe. Suave: “HE’S GOT HIM! *WHAM* OKLAHOMA DRILLER! OKLAHOMA DRILLER!...” The crowd suddenly cheers. Suave: “HERE COMES PCW SECURITY DIRECTOR DAWN McGILL!”

McGill, with Singapore Cane in hand, runs up to Walstreit. *THWACK* *THWACK* Walstreit staggers into the steel guardrail. Big Oil rips the jumper cables away from Dave the Mechanic and choke slams him. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! Dave bounced up about six inches off the canvas!” Big Oil goes for the jumper cables, McGill plants her 4 inch stiletto heels in his groin. Big Oil to his knees. *THWACK* Big Oil topples over. Daisy Cutter-Bomb attacks McGill from behind and knocks the Singapore cane away. McGill instinctively whirls around with an open hand and smacks Daisy in the face. She stumbles all the way across the ring. McGill picks up the Singapore cane but gets blindsided by the PCW Women’s champion Kathryn Randall Collins. KRC drives McGill to the corner. McGill kick to the groin with her stilettos stops KRC in her tracks. She takes two steps back and turns around to see ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin standing there- with her oversized pizza box. *WHAP* Suave: “HELLO! and GOODNIGHT! TESSA COVERS KRC! SHE COUNTS OUT HER OWN PINFALL.” An angry Tessa yells at KRC. Then she takes the pizza box and Arabian Facebusters KRC for good measure.

Domination Inc. CEO Mr. McMann arrives on scene with Whiskey Tango Foxtrot. Suave: “Mr. McMann is not happy.” McMann surveys the devastation of his Corporate group. Suave: “How much do you want to bet they’ll be an emergency board meeting after this? It’s going to take a few minutes to clean this up. We’ll be right back after this commercial message.
*
Basic Bloganomics - Home of Blog Wrestling Entertainment and a whole lot more.

Suave: “Okay, we’re back. Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit are in the ring. Mr. McMann and Domination Inc. are still ringside. PCW Security Director Dawn McGill is still ringside. And the Schett Brothers are ready to go. It looks like we’re going to have a match.”

MATCH #4 PCW TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH:
BIG OIL w/Texas Tex and KIRK WALSTREIT- Wall Street Market Analyst with Man Crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit © (Domination Inc.) vs.
JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT w/Horst Schett and Hans Gruber- the Extreme German Schnauzer (Progressive Alliance)

The bell rings. Big Oil takes one step forward and then climbs out of the ring. Big Oil, Walstreit, and the rest of Domination Inc walk back to the locker room. Again, the crowd craps all over it. Jack Schett stands in the ring with his arms outstretched. The referee starts to count Big Oil and Walstreit out. Suave: “They’re going back to the locker room. And of course, the title won’t change hands unless it’s a pin or submission so Big Oil and Walstreit will keep the belts. And PCW can’t say they no-showed because they were here. But the crowd is not happy.”

WINNER: JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT by count out. Big Oil and Walstreit retain PCW Tag Team Titles.

Suave: “PCW Title Match next. And just how ready is Kevin Scott going to be after getting tasered by Rough Justice? We’ll find out shortly.”

BACK DOOR OF HACK’S RUSTY NAIL SALOON
A group of Obama supporters are celebrating. “I’m just…so inspired! I want to make this country better!” The group agrees. “What a great day for America! We are all better people!” More agreement. “I’m ready for change. The old ways weren’t working! We need to all come together!” More agreement.

The back door opens. Former PCW CEO George W, and his father George H.W. leave Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon. “BOOOOOOOOO!” “NA-NA-NAAA-NAH NA-NA-NAAAA-NAH! HEY, HEY, HEY. GOODBYEEEEE!” A few throw empty beer cups towards W. Suave: “Hmmm…so much for ‘change.’”

W and H.W. get into their car and drive away. Suave: “There you have it. The former CEO of PCW, George W, has left the building.” O’Beck Bahama and Justin Sufferable walk towards the ring. Suave: “Kevin Scott is already in the ring and I’ve got to wonder if just 15 minutes or so after getting tasered by Rough Justice whether he can go or not.”

MATCH #5 PCW TITLE MATCH:
O’BECK BAHAMA w/ ‘Not Just Intolerable, not just unbearable, he is…’ Justin Sufferable (Progressive Alliance) vs.
KEVIN SCOTT (Joe SixPacks)
Scott leans back against the corner ringpost. Suave: “I don’t know…I don’t know if he can wrestle now.” The bell rings and Scott sprints from his corner catching Bahama by surprise. He takes out the legs and then works an arm bar. Bahama sticks his foot on the bottom rope and the ref breaks the hold. Scott gets up and tries to catch Bahama again. Bahama back body drops Scott right out of the ring onto the floor. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Scott lies there for 30 seconds before finally moving. Suave: “I’m sorry, they should stop this right now. He’s in no condition to wrestle.” The referee goes over to ask if he’s okay. Scott nods yes. He pulls himself back into the ring. Body slam by Bahama. Bahama backbreaker and that’s it. The referee calls for the bell.

WINNER AND STILL PCW CHAMPION: O’BECK BAHAMA

Suave: “I give Kevin Scott credit for trying. But he didn’t belong in the ring tonight after getting tasered. Next week, we’re back with PCW Extreme Political TV. We’ll see you then.”

---------------

Buckland County.com

Political Championship Wrestling at Blogspot

Political Championship Wrestling at Wordpress

American Heartland Bar and Grill

Prairie Depot Press at Blogspot

Exploding Sheep Productions

Screw the BCS at Blogspot

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

1/20-PCW Night of Champions-Hour 1: Barack Obama Becomes the PCW CEO, Sarah Palin and the Eskimo Queen vs. Keith Olbermann and Arianna Huffington

LAST WEEK ON PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV:

-‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Joe SixPacks) defeated Daisy Cutter-Bomb (Domination Inc.)
-‘The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin confronts Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman over their attacks at PCW House shows. Code Pink debuts and attacks Palin. She gets Eskimo Piefaced by Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen.
-Jack Schett and Bull Schett (Progressive Alliance) become the #1 contenders for the PCW Tag Team belts after beating ‘The Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade (Joe SixPacks)
-Domination Inc. announces that their Corporate Counsel Felcher and Felcher found a loophole in the PCW rules that state the only time title defenses are mandatory is at Pay Per View shows. Therefore, the PCW Tag Team and Women’s title matches at PCW Night of Champions will be non-title bouts.
-SNAFU was to have met PCW Television Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido for the TV belt. But Dave the Mechanic took him out in revenge for SNAFU interfering in his title matches against Escondido. Dave warns SNAFU to stay out of his match at PCW Night of Champions against Escondido.

PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV: January 20th from Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon, Westville, OH.
HOST: Johnny Suave

PCW OVERVIEW (for the uninitiated)

Suave:
Huge lines of people formed early this morning in front of Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon to see PCW Night of Champions and to watch the installment of Barack Obama as PCW CEO. Tonight’s card is as follows:

-‘The Eskimo Queen’ Kalee Jones and ’The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (American Patriots) vs. Code Pink and Emily List (Progressive Alliance)

-PCW Television Title Match: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido © (Progressive Alliance) defends against Dave the Mechanic (Joe Sixpacks)

-PCW Tag Team Title Match: Big Oil w/Texas Tex and Kirk Walstreit ‘Wall Street Market Analyst with a man crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit’ © (Domination Inc.) vs. Jack Schett and Bull Schett w/Horst Schett and Hans Gruber- the Extreme German Schnauzer

-PCW Women’s Title Match: Kathryn Randall Collins © (Domination Inc.) vs. ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Joe Sixpacks)

-PCW Title Match: O’Beck Bahama w/‘Not Just Unbearable…not just intolerable…he is’ Justin Sufferable © (Progressive Alliance) vs. Kevin Scott (Joe Sixpacks)

Suave:
Last week, Domination Inc. stated that the PCW Tag Team and Women’s Title matches involving their wrestlers will be non-title matches thanks to a loophole found in the PCW rules. Last night, the PCW Competition Committee worked late into the night to hammer out a change in the rules. Tonight, they announce their decision.

PCW COMPETITION COMMITTEE ANNOUNCEMENT CONCERNING TITLE DEFENSES
Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, and Steny Hoyer of the Progressive Alliance are joined by American Patriots’ John Boehner and Mitch McConnell. Pelosi: “Last week, Domination Inc. announced that they found a loophole in the PCW competition rules that allowed their wrestlers, PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit, PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins, not to put their title belts up in matches tonight. After a long consultation between all five members of the PCW Competition Committee, PCW CEO George W, and PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama, we have come up with a solution.” Pelosi produces a sheet of paper and reads from it. Pelosi: “We, the PCW Competition Committee, by unanimous vote, hereby change the PCW Rules and By-Laws as follows: ‘Each champion must put their title up in competition at Pay Per View shows, PCW Night of Champions, and otherwise, at least once a month. Therefore, the PCW Competition Committee decrees that tonight’s matches between Jack and Bull Schett vs. Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit WILL be for the PCW Tag Team belts. Tonight’s match between ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and Kathryn Randall Collins will be for the PCW Women’s title.”

Suave:
“There you have it! The PCW Competition Committee has overruled Domination Inc. We will have FOUR title matches tonight! All right, as we get set up for the Obama installment, let’s look at the new PCW Jersey that’s being modeled by no other than the Alaskan Pitbull Sarah Palin.

Suave:
*sighs* All I’m going to say about that jersey is this…


BARACK OBAMA INSTALLATION AS PCW CEO
The off-key strains of George W’s mariachi band playing the opening notes of “Hail to the Chief’ signal the entrance of the outgoing PCW CEO. George W and his aide de camp Dick, strained his back so he’s being wheeled up to the ring, somberly head towards the ring. The crowd gives him a middling ovation. Suave: “Well, one nice thing about W retiring. I won’t have to listen to that God-awful tone deaf mariachi band butcher ‘Hail to the Chief’ anymore.

*flute and clarinet flourish*

Two men come out and unroll a white carpet to the ring steps. Dancers then dance. Ballet dancers…ballet? Little children walk up the white carpet and drop rose petals. Someone lets loose some pigeons…we’re still not sure just how they’ll get out of the building. The crowd stands and lets out a loud ovation as PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama appears with his Aide de Camp to be Joe Biden by his side. Suave: “AND HERE COMES THE PCW CEO-DESIGNATE BARACK OBAMA! LISTEN TO THIS CROWD!” PCW Owner Bubba Jackson and PCW Director of Security Dawn McGill climb into the ring. Bubba prepares to administer the oath. Bubba: “All right…all right.” He tries to get the crowd to quiet down. Bubba: “Barack, are you ready?” Barack: “Yes.” Bubba: “Okay. Do you swear that you’ll…do the best possible job possible to…help PCW prosper…and get…” Barack: “Big?” Bubba: “Yeah. Big.” Barack: “Yes.” Bubba: “Congratulations Mr. CEO.” The crowd stands and cheers. Suave: “And that’s it? Barack Obama is now the PCW CEO…and maybe Bubba ought to write something out ahead of time before trying to administer the oath- such as it was.”

Barack:
“My fellow citizens: I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank George W. for his service to PCW, as well as the generosity and cooperation he has shown throughout this transition period. Today, I say to you that the challenges PCW faces are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this- they will be met.” The crowd claps. Barack: “We must-”

*‘Domination Inc. will completely takeover Political Championship Wrestling by any and all means*

Suave: “
Well? I wondered how long it was going to take Domination Inc. to come out. They can’t be the least bit happy about the PCW Competition Committee’s ruling. CEO ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann, CFO Gordon Guyko, Corporate Counsel Felcher and Felcher, and Whiskey Tango Foxtrot come to the ring. Suave: “Yep. McMann- not happy.” McMann: “All right Mr. PCW CEO. Earlier tonight, your competition committee did a grave disservice to Domination Inc. by making tonight’s matches involving Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit and Kathryn Randall Collins title matches. This is unacceptable and totally unfair. My wrestlers did not prepare for a title defense tonight.” Barack: “I haven’t signed the official proclamation yet, Mr. McMann. What are you asking?” McMann: “I’m not asking, I’m demanding. You either tear that piece of paper up and keep those matches non-title, or else Domination Inc will walk out of here and you’ll have no matches at all.” Suave: “WHOA! MR. McMANN IS THREATENING THE NEW PCW CEO!” Joe Biden leans into Obama’s ear. Biden: “See, I told you you’d face a challenge within 6 months.” Barack: “Oh, shut up.” Obama looks at McMann. Then he looks at the sheet of paper. Suave: “What is he going to do? Will Obama sign off on it? Or will he give in to Mr. McMann’s demands?”

McMann:
“Well? What’s it going to be?” Obama again glances at McMann. Then he reaches into his suit pocket, pulls out a pen, and defiantly signs off on the proclamation. The crowd explodes. Mr. McMann goes ballistic. McMann: “FINE! THAT’S IT. DOMINATION INC- WE’RE OUT OF HERE!” McMann turns to leave. Barack: “Before you all leave the premises, make sure you give the title belts to Ms. McGill here.” McMann stops and turns around. McMann: “What?” Barack: “You see, there’s a clause in the PCW rules that state if a wrestler deliberately no-shows a match without giving notice or cause, then he or she automatically forfeits whatever title he or she has. So, if you want to walk out of here- be my guest. Just leave the belts behind before you go.” Again, the crowd cheers. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! MR. McMANN CAN’T BELIEVE IT!” Obama produces a PCW rulebook and turns it to the appropriate page and points to it. Barack: “So…what’s it going to be?” McMann spins on his heels and walks out with the other members of Domination Inc. in tow.

Suave:
“WHAT WILL HAPPEN NOW? WILL DOMINATION INC SHOW UP FOR THEIR MATCHES?” Backstage, McMann, Guyko, WTF, and Felcher and Felcher file into Domination Inc’s suite. Two Buckland County Sheriff’s Deputies guard the door to intercept them if they attempt to leave Hack’s with the title belts.

PCW NEWSLINE

KEITH OLBERMANN, ARIANNA HUFFINGTON, AND PROFESSOR PAUL KRUGMAN ONCE AGAIN ATTACK SARAH PALIN AT PCW HOUSE SHOW

But this time, The Alaskan Pitbull gets a little back up…

REPLAY FROM 1/17 PCW HOUSE SHOW IN VAN WERT, OHIO

KALEE JONES w/Sarah Palin (American Patriots) vs.
‘Trailer Park Sweetheart’ TANYA HARDY w/The White Trash Posse (Independent)
Jones Eskimo Piefaces Hardy and pins her. Sarah Palin enters the ring and holds up Jones’ hand in victory.

Code Pink hits the ring and confronts Palin. Olbermann, Huffington, and Krugman climb into the ring as well and join Code Pink. Kalee Jones stands next to Palin. Emily List of the Progressive Alliance sneaks in behind Palin and grabs her. She starts choking her. Jones turns around and moves towards List. Code Pink leaps on her back and locks in a sleeper hold. Jones spins around briefly and slowly succumbs to the sleeper. Code Pink then pulls out a pair of handcuffs and cuffs Palin to the ring post. Both List and Code Pink start whaling away on Palin. Huffington joins in as Olbermann and Krugman smugly look on.

Then a woman wearing a fur coat, a bikini top underneath, a mini-skirt, and stiletto heels, smoking a cigarette and swilling from a bottle of Jack Daniels runs in with Politically Incorrect (NRA, Nic Koteen, Al Cahall). NRA, Koteen, and Cahall hit the ring. Huffington, Olbermann and Krugman quickly exit. Koteen yanks Code Pink off of Palin and throws her across the ring. Cahall lifts up Emily List and holds her for a now revived Kalee Jones. Jones Eskimo Piefaces List. Then she Eskimo Piefaces Code Pink.

A QUICK LOOK AT TWO PCW FACTIONS:

From left to right: R Felcher, D.B. Ruff, B Felcher, Connor Justice, Quad R, Richard Emerson Brantley III, CEO 'Sports Entertainment Genius' Mr. McMann, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, Kathryn Randall Collins...aka KRC, CFO Gordon Guyko, Kirk Walstreit (holding up picture of ESPN's Kirk Herbstreit), Daisy Cutter-Bomb, Big Oil, Bradley Scott Wilson Esq, Texas Tex

From left to right: American Trucker, PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl Tessa Martin, Average Joe, Tequila Sheila, Dave the Mechanic, Kevin Scott, Gary Locke of Locke and Loade, Earl Loade of Locke and Loade

MATCH #1 KALEE JONES- The Eskimo Queen and ‘The Alaskan Pitbull’ SARAH PALIN (American Patriots) vs.
CODE PINK and EMILY LIST w/Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman (Progressive Alliance)
Suave:
“Well, well, well. After two weeks of withering sneak attacks by Olbermann, Huffington, and Krugman, Palin may get her hands on them tonight. Kalee Jones is going to be a force in the PCW Women’s division very soon.” Jones and Code Pink to start. They lock up and Jones shoves Code Pink to the canvas. Code Pink back up and hits a single leg takedown on the Eskimo Queen. They roll around a bit before dropping out of the ring to the floor. Code Pink drop kicks Jones who barely budges. She tries again. Jones move and Code Pink kicks the steel barricade. Jones goes for a table but Emily List comes around and stops that. List is then heaved into the barricade by Jones and she again goes for a table. Code Pink tries to get up. Suave: “I think Code Pink hurt her ankle. She’s not moving very well.” Code Pink can barely walk. Jones grabs List by the hair and drags her to the table. List rakes the eyes and manages to escape. Jones, temporarily blinded, grabs the injured Code Pink and sets her up for the Eskimo Pieface. Suave: “Oh, no…*WHAM* HOLY CRAP!” Crowd: “PCW!...PCW!...PCW!” List missile dropkicks Jones and drives her into the remnants of the table on top of Code Pink.

Arianna throws a chain to List and she busts Jones open with it. List grinds the chain into the Eskimo Queen’s open cut. List whips Jones with the chain across the back several times. Then she wraps it around her neck and tries to choke her out with it. Jones manages to power out and escape. Jones lands a right but List takes her legs out and she slams back to the mat. List finds a chair and sets Jones in it. Then she climbs back into the ring. Suave: “THIS COULD BE IT! WAIT! SARAH PALIN’S IN THE RING!” List sees her and turns around. Palin charges and spears List. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Crowd: “HOLY S***!...HOLY S***!...HOLY S***!” Both ladies tumble to the floor! Jones puts List in the chair. She goes back in and DIVES through the ropes and destroys List. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! KALEE JONES JUST SPEARED LIST ON THE CHAIR-…HERE COMES THE ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS!” Olbermann and Krugman doubleteam Jones and throw her into the steel barricade. Huffington waves Eric Alterman, Daily Kos, and Media Matters for America to Palin and they attack her. Huffington pulls out a table. Suave: “THEY’RE GOING TO PUT SARAH PALIN THROUGH A TABLE!” Daily Kos and Alterman lift Palin up.

Suave:
“IT’S POLITICALLY INCORRECT!” Nic Koteen, Al Cahall, NRA, and the mysterious woman wearing a bikini top covered by a lush, fur coat, smoking a cigarette and swilling from a bottle of Jack Daniels. *CLANG* *CLANG* Suave: “KOTEEN AND CAHALL PLASTER DAILY KOS AND ALTERMAN WITH CHAIR SHOTS!” NRA low blows Olbermann. Then he lifts him up across his shoulders. Suave: “GUN RACK! GUN RACK! GUN RACK!” Krugman shoves NRA. NRA drops Olbermann and locks in on Krugman. Suave: “Big mistake there, Paul. Guess you’re not as smart as you think you are.” Krugman tries to beg off. NRA lifts him up and… Suave: “GUN RACK! GUN RACK! GUN RACK!” Arianna’s in the ring and backing away from the mysterious woman. Arianna: “Who…who the hell are you?” Woman: “You can call me the Queen of Anti-Political Extreme- Andrea Doria.” Suave: “The Queen of Anti-Political Extreme. Interesting choice of name.” Andrea: “You know, I may not agree with everything Sarah Palin stands for. But I can’t sit back and watch the way she’s been treated without doing something. Just because she's a woman and doesn't spout the NOW line, just because she lives in Alaska and they have a different way of going about things, and just because she doesn't kow tow to the political correctness dogma, does not give you carte blanche to tee off on her like that. An eye for an eye. If you keep attacking Sarah Palin, Politically Incorrect and I will be there and return the fire in spades.” Suave: “WHOA! ANDREA DORIA AND POLITICALLY INCORRECT ARE COMING TO SARAH PALIN’S AID! WE’VE GOT FOUR TITLE MATCHES COMING UP IN JUST A MINUTE!”

---------------

Buckland County.com

Political Championship Wrestling at Blogspot

Political Championship Wrestling at Wordpress

American Heartland Bar and Grill

Prairie Depot Press at Blogspot

Exploding Sheep Productions

Screw the BCS at Blogspot